I use social anxiety as an excuse to not do anything else. I'm constantly nagged to go out of the house and do stuff but I keep telling myself that cannot happen until I take the first step in seeking professional help.
Essentially I try to convince myself that social anxiety is some massive wall standing in my way and every other obstacle in life is behind it and can only be dealt with when my condition is resolved. In reality though, it's through overcoming these little obstacles that will alow me to overcome my anxiety.
I've stopped sabotaging myself as much as I used to. I've almost gotten rid of negative/destructive thinking. I'm gaining more and more control over what I eat and how much. And getting rid of not doing things that help me just because of laziness.
But the one way I am still sabotaging myself greatly is how I think and react in social situations. As with everything else I've worked on--especially my thinking--it's just going to take practice/experience. As with the thinking habits I've had that were always present, I have thinking habits that are only present in social situations. So I can't really work on them, outside of social situations.
I sabotage myself by thinking the worst result is going to happen. Thus, I fall into kind of a Catch-22. For instance, was going to take a medical test. I was afraid of a bad diagnosis from the test but felt even if the diagnosis was good, i would suffer from the worst risks of the test. Either way was going to be a disaster in my mind.
I can't help but treat myself poorly every single day. I have live a long, painful, insufferable, and emotional turmoil and it's not getting any better. I don't know what else to do than to just wait and let time pass by until I get older. I literally have little interesting things going on in my life. I'm a bum and I'll admit that. I have very low self esteem but I don't really care anymore at this point. People have hurt me so much that I just stopped caring. Even my appearance has changed throughout the years.(not that I dress like a slob or anything. I'm still healthy.) I don't like doing anything at all except going on the internet or just lie in bed and doodle in my notebook. I wish I could at least talk to one therapist who will treat me with some sort of prescription to counter my depression or maybe actually giving me some helpful advice with my problems.
I sabotage myself by worrying too much about what other people would think of me. Because of that, I refrain myself from making some necessary changes in my life for being afraid of people saying "I don't believe you like that", "I don't believe you do that"...
I sabotage myself by thinking the worst result is going to happen.
Me too. I´m nervouss and scared that the worst is gonna happen. Almost everyday I prepare myself mentally for bad things to happen, like "okay now I prepare myself to fail or to get bullied or attacked". It´s a lot of stress to live with.
I sabotage myself by worrying too much about what other people would think of me. Because of that, I refrain myself from making some necessary changes in my life for being afraid of people saying "I don't believe you like that", "I don't believe you do that"...
Yes I also worry way too much about what other people think or how they will react to me. But on the other hand I notice myself being provocative sometimes, when I feel confident, it works as a relief because I get enough of worrying about other peoples opinion.
I agree with procrastination. And my anxiety seems to produce "self fulfilling prophecies" as one counselor called it. The more I dread something, the more likely I am to make it happen. If I think "don't be weird, don't be weird!" you can bet your bottom dollar I'll do something weird.
Lastly, I sabotage myself by purposely half-trying, so that when everything goes badly it won't be because my best wasn't good enough.
I am absolutely addicted to sabotaging myself for many reasons.
Only because I am not my healthy self for the longest time, I feel like I am more realistic if I dislike myself, because I am delusional and assume everybody will dislike me when they find out how I really am. Then at least when they come to this point, they will respect my opinion, in which they agree with.
I'd rather be distracted by pain than realize the world is different from the perfection I had as a child ;/ Which create the non healthy self. Really like this thread question, I know it sucks, but it is all our power that creates our life.
I want to give my esteem a boost and say that i have improved alot.
I used to be very bitter at others when they hurt me because i was 'possessed' by a wrong sense of 'an eye for an eye' kind of justice and the word revenge was always in my head. Every time i finished getting my revenge i would feel like complete shit. But i would still do it. Now, my mentality has completely changed and even if people manage to hurt me alot, i manage to keep very calm and try to fix what happened, relationships etc. But now revenge is the least of my thoughts.
I never get angry about nonsense anymore and regretting it aftewards as i used to. And as a result i feel that i have become a much nicer and wiser person.
I still have alot of self discipline problems to fix in that alot of times i just, for unknown reasons, go against my own rules and feel shit afterwards but i still think that i have improved alot in recent years in what concerns my relationships with people.
Me not losing weight and eating healthy, going to the doctor to see if I have high blood pressure or cholesterol, not pushing myself to do everything I should be doing due to motivation, having a inferior complex, not conquering sad, depression, and ocd, and not clearing my skin.
I sabotage my beauty in trying to protect the sensibilities of others.
So what, if in the worst case scenario, I weird people out or they don't like me? They can always leave but I must live with myself. I must live with the consequences of suffocating my full expression for the petty payoff of not offending someone else's sensibilities.
Sabotage is such an awesome word...very 007. But anyway, I think I've only just begun to realize that I am my own worst enemy and I sabotage myself in so many ways...Procrastination-holy shit, I'm the damn queen-I swear I'll be late to my own funeral. I also just put myself down every chance I have, I've NEVER been able to take a compliment. I can't even be in a real relationship because I truly don't understand how someone can like me enough to want to be with me for more than 10 hours. Does anyone else relate...to any of this? I'm new here and of course...I need some reassurance I'm not the only one.
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