has anyone told their friends they have sp

1984

1984

Active member
I havent been able to tell my friends that i have sp because i feel embaresd, cause before i had sp i was the lively 1 in the group, and now im the complete aposite, i hardly go out with them anymore and lost contact with some of them. The only time i speak to them is on the phone.
does anyone have the same problem?
 
anneley

anneley

Member
I did tell some of my friends and one of them apparently has an anxiety disorder too, not SA but still... so we actually are closer now and can discuss our problems openly.
I find myself feeling better after I told them, at least, on those days, when I'm not feeling like myself and I go into hiding... they understand...
 
W

wistful_dementia

Well-known member
hmmmm... I don't think I ever have. I did tell an ex girlfriend of mine who just laughed at me because she went through a tragic experinece as a chile and suffered from selective mutism. It was a matter of hers being more valid and extreme than mine. But, the past is the past I suppose.

But, I also had a friend that recognized I had a problem when I was 15 (about 15 years ago). We went to the mall... which I always hated, but bore in order to just hang out with my friend. One day, A friend of his and came up to us. Of course I became tense. His friend was with a friend of hers. She appeared very mean and snobbish... She appeared to just stand there and snear. Well, you may see where this is going... but when she and her friend (the friend of my friend) left I told my friend that I am glad she left and asked my friend what was wrong with that girl- she appeared almost hostile.... he said to me 'she's just like you' she is very uncomfortable around strangers and that she is actually a nice person. She was the first and only social phobe that I met up until I found this site. But, after that I was much less quick to judge people who appeared mean... well, at least the quiet ones.

ps- sorry to put you guys throught the friend of the friend of the friend thing :lol:
 
thugaveli

thugaveli

Well-known member
I think its a burden i have with telling my friends about SP

The friends i had wouldnt understand this and they would see this as a weak point and probably think i was mental

The friends i used to have (as i have non now because ive cut myself off) arn't sensitive enough to understand especially with guys

I just think it would be a negative step for me :roll:
 
Faded

Faded

Well-known member
i never told my friends .. but one of my classmates knew about it! :oops:
she told me she read it in last year's pschology book, i was embarrased!
she then told her friend about it .. her friend started laughing n' i thnk some of my classmates heard it from her .. n' they didnt understand about it .. so they didnt care .. cuz i didnt even care ..

But i never dared telling my friends about it .. its very very embarrasing!

Well its funny, i know a friend who has SP(noticed) .. thu he doesnt know he's suffering from it!
 
Nadine333

Nadine333

Well-known member
someone_on_here said:
Hellraising said:
What friends?
Click to expand...

yeah same saying goes for me.
Click to expand...

I had friends, then A freind, then I,
but if you can talk to them about it and they understand thats fantastic, I wouldnt share it with them unless your TRUELY trust them afterall it is scary letting people know your weakness
 
1984

1984

Active member
thanks guys, i agree with Nadine333
i dont want to show them my weak point but if it keeps eating me up inside im going to tell them, thanks 4 your support
 
Nadine333

Nadine333

Well-known member
1984 said:
thanks guys, i agree with Nadine333
i dont want to show them my weak point but if it keeps eating me up inside im going to tell them, thanks 4 your support
Click to expand...

If you do tell them I hope it works out for you x
 
redlady

redlady

Well-known member
Coldfury wrote:


When I used to have friends I tried to, but they didn't understand and just made fun of me.
Click to expand...

That's always the fear isn't it. And that's exactly why i am so selective with who i tell.
 
Meatwad

Meatwad

Well-known member
A lot of the time, I will feel that its okay to mention that I have this problem, because that way they will know why I am weird about stuff, gives an explaination for why I wouldn't want to do this or that
 
I_Hate_Life

I_Hate_Life

Member
My GP this morning was the first person i have ever told, i suppose i am ashamed in a way, feel weak somewhat.

But i am a very private person anyway, i like to keep things to myself, even if i was the most confident person in the world i would still probably keeps things close to my chest so to speak.
 
why_do_I_try

why_do_I_try

Active member
Faded said:
i never told my friends .. but one of my classmates knew about it! :oops:
she told me she read it in last year's pschology book, i was embarrased!
she then told her friend about it .. her friend started laughing n' i thnk some of my classmates heard it from her .. n' they didnt understand about it .. so they didnt care .. cuz i didnt even care ..

But i never dared telling my friends about it .. its very very embarrasing!

Well its funny, i know a friend who has SP(noticed) .. thu he doesnt know he's suffering from it!
Click to expand...

i dont mean to sound...whatever the word is but please try to tell him faded in some way, like by saying you read about it and thought he might have it so he wont know you have it. ive had sp for about 2 years and only known about it for a few months, its such a relieve knowing what it is.

ive told two of my friends but not in person, over msn which is kind of hard to explain in an instant message, so far they've both carried on as if nothing has happened, i don't know what they think of me which is really worrying.
 
DazedNConfused

DazedNConfused

Well-known member
I've told my two friends

One was very supportive and said he was glad I was seeking help (was surprised cause im so at ease when i'm around them), and the other kinda supportive, but thought it was weird that i'd get nervous around women (bear in mind that i'm 32... :cry: ), even though he had anxiety problems himself. I guess for some people, it's hard to see outside your own realm! He's still a good friend, although it hurt alittle when he said that.
 
sensitive

sensitive

Well-known member
well, this is a good question. i am very careful when trying to tell anybody. actually i have no friend but i told some people who are so close to me like my cousine, my companion to here.

today i live with a family, i told one of them that i have something called SA/SP and i explained what it is, he is an intelligent young man because he easily got it :eek: . i am still surprised he said i can recognice such these feelings.
 
T

triceratops

Well-known member
Yeah I have the same problem my "mates" aren't exactly the senstive type and wouldn understand so it pointless thinking about telling them.

Couldn't tell my family either my family don't see me as a shy person neither do my mates as I "pretend" to be confident all the time. I have to much pride i'd rather carry on fighting SA in my head getting by day to day
 
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