Going on a first date: how not to be awkward

Mehh

Active member
So, I was asked out for the first time, ever, today. I will be going on a date with this person later this week. Not sure what compelled me to say yes, seeing as I am very socially inept. I fear that the date will be a disaster; I am extremely shy and awkward, especially in one-on-one situations. So, I was wondering if you guys have any tips/stories about dating and how you handled your social anxiety? My main concern is not being able to keep a conversation moving, or that everything I say will come off as forced or awkward (how it usually does when I talk to a person irl). Eye contact is also a toughie for me.
 

21NZ

Well-known member
Ask lots of questions.... that way you wont have to say as much? and you might find a common interest...
 

Lamb

Well-known member
Well. Being that you're a girl makes it a bit easier. This person is probably already aware that you're shy, I'm guessing. One thing that happens when I get nervous is laughing, blushing, some slight stuttering or mispronunciation of words. Acknowledging that you're shy and nervous from the start does help. I'd usually say something like "excuse any silent gaps or awkwardness" and then as the date moves along I start to become more comfortable.

The guy or girl will probably think your slight mishaps are cute anyway. They may be nervous as well! Don't over analyze, just try to let things flow and be in the moment. I prefer to let the awkwardness run free- it's what will make the date unique and that way I don't feel forced trying to play something I'm not. Also, be sure to ask the other person questions so you're not placed in the spotlight the entire time.

As for the eye contact, you can try glancing at things on the person's face and not necessarily their eyes the entire time. Or you could just do something that doesn't involve too much focus, like watching a movie.

You'll be alright, best of luck :)
Oh, and if you feel the need to end it early or want to get out of it for some reason, ask somebody to call you so you have some excuse.
 
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