Mehh
Active member
Recently, a friend told me about what's called an external locus of identity. Having an external locus of identity means that one values oneself only as much as he/she is valued by others around them. This manifests itself in constantly seeking the approval of others.
I've been thinking about it and I've realized that this really defines my life and the way that I see myself. Feeling criticized/disliked/unwanted tends to lower my self-worth, making me ashamed of my personality and hate the way that I am. When I feel accepted and liked -- even loved-- by others, however, I see myself in a more positive light, enjoying and being proud of my unique, albeit awkward, personality. This notion often causes me to lose sight of myself- I can feel confident about who I am one day, and then disgusted with myself the next. Clearly, my sense of self-worth should be based on my pride in personality/strength of character, and not by what others around me think. I know that this is unhealthy, but I also know that I can't be the only person who feels this way. What do you guys think about this? Does this apply to anyone else?
I've been thinking about it and I've realized that this really defines my life and the way that I see myself. Feeling criticized/disliked/unwanted tends to lower my self-worth, making me ashamed of my personality and hate the way that I am. When I feel accepted and liked -- even loved-- by others, however, I see myself in a more positive light, enjoying and being proud of my unique, albeit awkward, personality. This notion often causes me to lose sight of myself- I can feel confident about who I am one day, and then disgusted with myself the next. Clearly, my sense of self-worth should be based on my pride in personality/strength of character, and not by what others around me think. I know that this is unhealthy, but I also know that I can't be the only person who feels this way. What do you guys think about this? Does this apply to anyone else?