Don't like the person i have become

recluse

Well-known member
#1
I have turned into a short tempered asshole. I don't know what it is but people are pissing me off more than ever. I never used to get angry when driving for instance but now if there's a slow driver in front of me....Arrrgghhh! I just have no patience for anyone like i used to, i feel sellfish and almost arrogant. I feel that i am nasty to my parents and i feel bad about it.
 
#2
You have to know yourself if you really HATE the people or you are just pissed off because you are impatient - there is nothing wrong with that I think. Then you can swear in your car as long as nobody hears you :) .
 
#4
i feel exactly the same way.sometimes i will even catch my self thinking about being in a fight and beating someone even though i never had a fight and i totally don't agree with beating people!and i also treat my parents like shit although i know they are the best people i know :oops: maybe it's because i want to blame someone for my situation because don't believe it's my fault for being like this
 

dpr

Well-known member
#5
recluse said:
I have turned into a short tempered asshole. I don't know what it is but people are pissing me off more than ever. I never used to get angry when driving for instance but now if there's a slow driver in front of me....Arrrgghhh! I just have no patience for anyone like i used to, i feel sellfish and almost arrogant. I feel that i am nasty to my parents and i feel bad about it.
Yeah, ya know I was going to start a thread about this until I saw yours.

I am short with my family sometimes too, and driving pisses me off so much. Some of my friends have said "Well, everybody hates driving," but I don't think they get it. I will take it really personally if someone cuts me off, and I'll get EXTREMELY angry if a light changes yellow when I'm too far away to gun it and drive through. Then I'll usually yell to myself "That light always changes to yellow before I can go through!"

I don't know what it is, but I think it's just feeling overwhelmed with work, being unhappy with where I am in my life, and I'm projecting it onto other things. Also, usually when I am driving I am going somewhere I don't want to be (i.e. work) so I'm not in the best mood anyway.

Have you ever tried meditating or deep breathing. It has helped me, but I still have anger problems.
 

Iseesky

Well-known member
#6
The easiest thing to do is take it out on others. Family is terrible, because you are so comfortable with them, they are the easiest to yell at. I find that I'm this way sometimes. Like someone else has basically said, when I'm upset about something I have to be doing (going to work, going out somewhere, giving a presentation in school), I get so wound up thinking about it that the slightest things that happen will release all of my emotions. I try to find other ways to release...writing helps, taking a walk in an uninhabited area to think and talk to myself, yelling and screaming in the backyard with my little cousins help aswell.
 

noblame4

Well-known member
#7
I think a lot of us, (myself, for sure) feel like we dont have a right to get angry or stand up for ourselves, but really we have just as much claim on being a pain in the ass as anyone else does. If someone is being a dick to me, and i just let them walk all over me, then i get twice as angry at myself. It's okay to let people know that they need to back off, is what im getting at.

and oh god, dont get me started on traffic!! The other day, i was driving on the interstate, when the lane i was in started to end unexpectedly (construction), i NEEDED to get over, but this DICK in a huge pickup was in the lane beside me, and he would NOT let me get over!(like, when i sped up, HE sped up, when i slowed down, HE slowed down. what the hell?!) I had to slam on my brakes going 70 to keep from flying off into the woods! Agh! If i could've got at that guy...but i couldnt so i just layed on the horn and flipped him off when i caught up with him. All he did was speed up and lose me. MORAL OF THE STORY, if some skid-mark thinks it's okay to try and END MY DAMN LIFE, i can harrass him and throw obscene gestures at him for a couple of miles.
 

recluse

Well-known member
#8
Drivemycar said:
The easiest thing to do is take it out on others. Family is terrible, because you are so comfortable with them, they are the easiest to yell at. I find that I'm this way sometimes. Like someone else has basically said, when I'm upset about something I have to be doing (going to work, going out somewhere, giving a presentation in school), I get so wound up thinking about it that the slightest things that happen will release all of my emotions. I try to find other ways to release...writing helps, taking a walk in an uninhabited area to think and talk to myself, yelling and screaming in the backyard with my little cousins help aswell.
Yes because i am comfortable with them, but i feel bad whenether i am like this.
 

RedRibbons

Well-known member
#9
I am the same way... I find myself short with people. Getting annoyed easily. Generally disliking society. Getting frustrated with my family quickly.. I'm trying not to be so easily annoyed though.

All I can say is maybe try being physically active.. To get your energy out. I'm trying it, hoping for it to work. :)
 

Doomed2Die

Well-known member
#10
Reason and exercise works for me, reason because most of time things just need to be thought over. And energy can be expressed through exercise rather than violence. Personally following the bibles advice on these small issues in life has been stupendously beneficial and suprisingly satisfying to do.

RedRibbons said:
All I can say is maybe try being physically active.. To get your energy out. I'm trying it, hoping for it to work. :)
I should get round to doing that also.
 

lonely_world

Well-known member
#11
You too? :lol: I know what you mean, that's exactly how i've been feeling every year since my mom died. I will just start flipping people off in traffic, or make rude comments to people in a grocery store, and I do too feel bad about it. That's why i'm making a true effort to change my anger, and working with my therapist on it. She's a great therapist, but now she's leaving soon! Just my luck, oh well. Recluse, just learn to take a few deep breaths and a time-out when you feel ready to explode. It makes a difference, believe me.
 

recluse

Well-known member
#13
lonely_world said:
You too? :lol: I know what you mean, that's exactly how i've been feeling every year since my mom died. I will just start flipping people off in traffic, or make rude comments to people in a grocery store, and I do too feel bad about it. That's why i'm making a true effort to change my anger, and working with my therapist on it. She's a great therapist, but now she's leaving soon! Just my luck, oh well. Recluse, just learn to take a few deep breaths and a time-out when you feel ready to explode. It makes a difference, believe me.
I'm sorry to hear about you mum. I'll bear that in mind, but it's so hard once the red mist sets in.
 

celestialrecluse

Well-known member
#14
im just the same, i find my fuse has gotten really short over the past couple of months, what i do is wear a rubber band on my wrist, when i feel like i wanna go postal on someone, i snap the band and count to ten. it works for me!
 

EscapeArtist

Well-known member
#16
I've become like this also, it's really hard to hold back my irritation with little things that are out of my control. Partly it is because I'm unhappy, but I think it's also because I'm used to being "in control" when i'm alone, we haven't pushed ourselves into situations that are out of our control very often and so when little things that take that control away from us sneak up on us, like traffic and waiting for others, well, yeah..
 

EasySkankin

Well-known member
#17
I think a lot of us, (myself, for sure) feel like we dont have a right to get angry or stand up for ourselves, but really we have just as much claim on being a pain in the ass as anyone else does. If someone is being a dick to me, and i just let them walk all over me, then i get twice as angry at myself. It's okay to let people know that they need to back off, is what im getting at.

and oh god, dont get me started on traffic!! The other day, i was driving on the interstate, when the lane i was in started to end unexpectedly (construction), i NEEDED to get over, but this DICK in a huge pickup was in the lane beside me, and he would NOT let me get over!(like, when i sped up, HE sped up, when i slowed down, HE slowed down. what the hell?!) I had to slam on my brakes going 70 to keep from flying off into the woods! Agh! If i could've got at that guy...but i couldnt so i just layed on the horn and flipped him off when i caught up with him. All he did was speed up and lose me. MORAL OF THE STORY, if some skid-mark thinks it's okay to try and END MY DAMN LIFE, i can harrass him and throw obscene gestures at him for a couple of miles.
werd!

We have a right to be selfish and pissed off too. I think that is a big reason why most of us have social anxiety - we seek approval of people too much/try to make them happy/be nice to them. Be selfish, do what makes YOU happy, and you'll see that your anxiety will subside. This doesn't mean you have to be a dick though, unless that makes you happy - then go ahead. I'd rather be a dick than have to put up with social anxiety - to be honest ;)
 

seafolly

Well-known member
#18
werd!

We have a right to be selfish and pissed off too. I think that is a big reason why most of us have social anxiety - we seek approval of people too much/try to make them happy/be nice to them. Be selfish, do what makes YOU happy, and you'll see that your anxiety will subside. This doesn't mean you have to be a dick though, unless that makes you happy - then go ahead. I'd rather be a dick than have to put up with social anxiety - to be honest ;)
I agree - we're sensitive ones and take too much to heart! Just last week I found myself tearing up over a simple statement from my father that shouldn't have upset me at all. Thickening of the skin is a tricky thing to wish for but wow it would be nice. One side of my brain is ready to get fired up and the other is all, "Dude! Chillll! There's no reason why this should be upsetting!" It's usually worse when the anxiety disorder is heightened.
 

IAMN

Well-known member
#20
I have a short temper at times, but less so now. I use to take it out on family a lot because I knew they would take it. The last outburst I had was at my sister's high school graduation. I straight up just yelled at my 70 year old gradma for taking too many pictures and being too loud... it was crowded and I was very nervous. First time I've seen them in 2 years and I yelled at them... I was extra nice for the rest of the time after realizing I was a jackass. What 6 year old kid thinks to himself-- "when I grow up, I wanna be be so nervous in front of crowds it actually produces rage"...
 
Top