Do you ever feel like a child?

doubtmyself

doubtmyself

Banned
Sometimes I think (as the saying goes) I'm a "boy sent on a man's errand."

Life's challenges are for those other "mature types" who like pressure. Getting a job, keeping a job, paying bills, saving money, getting up in the morning, being assertive in relationships, staying healthy, trying to stay positive without complaining or leaning on someone else.....

I'm just pretending to be a grown-up. I'd much rather go back to my childhood without the responsibiity.
 
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Silatuyok

Well-known member
I didn't like being a child, but now that I'm an adult, sometimes I wish other people would treat me like one. Why do people assume that I ever learned how to speak up for myself? or how to make friends? or how to work through my anger and frustration without needing to be held tightly and consoled?
 
Aletheia

Aletheia

Well-known member
One ex-boyfriend, during a particularly stressful phase of my life, had a couple of cats he doted on, whom I secretly envied. Why could I not be so free of responsibility?

I sometimes wonder if that was what my breakdown was all about: abdication of adulthood.
 
Insanewoman389

Insanewoman389

Well-known member
doubtmyself said:
Sometimes I think (as the saying goes) I'm a "boy sent on a man's errand."

Life's challenges are for those other "mature types" who like pressure. Getting a job, keeping a job, paying bills, saving money, getting up in the morning, being assertive in relationships, staying healthy, trying to stay positive without complaining or leaning on someone else.....

I'm just pretending to be a grown-up. I'd much rather go back to my childhood without the responsibiity.
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Its how I feel all the time! I feel like a child and I feel like I'm just pretending to be an adult its so depressing :/
 
Invisibleman

Invisibleman

Well-known member
I feel like a child all of the time. Everybody else my age are already doing all of these adult type things while im a clueless little child about to be sent into the real world.
 
razzle dazzle rose

razzle dazzle rose

Well-known member
I just don't know how people in the "real" world do it: jobs, marriage, kids. Those are all things I want for myself too. Why is it so hard for me?
I have little responsibility, and I do resent being treated like a child being told what to do. But people won't ever take me seriously if I continue acting like some angsty teenager. And yet I don't know any other way to be. How do people grow up? I just feel like I am floating, waiting for "something" to happen.
 
doubtmyself

doubtmyself

Banned
And the connection to social anxiety?
Are the socially anxious like other mentally ill, who find it hard to survive in the real adult world?
 
doubtmyself

doubtmyself

Banned
razzle dazzle rose said:
I just don't know how people in the "real" world do it: jobs, marriage, kids. Those are all things I want for myself too. Why is it so hard for me?
I have little responsibility, and I do resent being treated like a child being told what to do. But people won't ever take me seriously if I continue acting like some angsty teenager. And yet I don't know any other way to be. How do people grow up? I just feel like I am floating, waiting for "something" to happen.
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Posts like these show that at least you are self-aware...which is half the battle.
 
irrational

irrational

Active member
Aletheia said:
I'm not sure that they do, they just fake it.
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I am 'grown up' in the sense that I am married, have kids, career, etc. But in reality, I feel no different then i did when I was 16 or 17. Same fears same anxiety, same doubts, same desires, same almost everything. School turned into work, class mates are now co workers, teachers are the bosses. That awesome new bike you worked your ass of for in high school turned into a kids' braces. The interactions are exactly the same, too. Instead of envying some kids new shoes it's the new car, house, etc. Instead of picking on the fat kid we now pick on the fat guy ... etc.

See, nothing really changes as we 'grow up'. We buy bigger toys, shave more often and get fat, but that's about it. I don't even think we pretend we've grown up, I think we only see other people grow up and expect that we should fit that mold sooner or later, too. Thing is, most other people feel the same way and no one ends up fitting that mold.
 
A

AGR

Well-known member
irrational said:
I am 'grown up' in the sense that I am married, have kids, career, etc. But in reality, I feel no different then i did when I was 16 or 17. Same fears same anxiety, same doubts, same desires, same almost everything. School turned into work, class mates are now co workers, teachers are the bosses. That awesome new bike you worked your ass of for in high school turned into a kids' braces. The interactions are exactly the same, too. Instead of envying some kids new shoes it's the new car, house, etc. Instead of picking on the fat kid we now pick on the fat guy ... etc.

See, nothing really changes as we 'grow up'. We buy bigger toys, shave more often and get fat, but that's about it. I don't even think we pretend we've grown up, I think we only see other people grow up and expect that we should fit that mold sooner or later, too. Thing is, most other people feel the same way and no one ends up fitting that mold.
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Couldnt say it better,agree with everything,not much changed,some people see me as immature because I am quiet,dont like to get into real confrontation,I grew to ignore most things and I am not in a relationship,but I see the same in them,same kind of jokes like when I was in school,same comportament generally,just in a diferent enviroment.
 
upndwn

upndwn

Well-known member
I was contemplating this myself the other day. I'm 33 years old and I never really had to have much responsibility for anyone but myself. Most of my time is spent doing "childish" stuff like playing games and reading comic books. I've never really dedicated myself to something which society would consider useful or appropriate for an adult. I still live like when I was 17, don't have a car or a driver's license, no girlfriend and live in a cheap run down apartment I can barely afford. I have no idea how people can have kids, obligations, houses, cars, spouses and a gazillion things to worry about at the same time. I can barely manage holding down a part time job and taking care of my own needs.
 
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powerfulthoughts

Well-known member
doubtmyself said:
Sometimes I think (as the saying goes) I'm a "boy sent on a man's errand."

Life's challenges are for those other "mature types" who like pressure. Getting a job, keeping a job, paying bills, saving money, getting up in the morning, being assertive in relationships, staying healthy, trying to stay positive without complaining or leaning on someone else.....

I'm just pretending to be a grown-up. I'd much rather go back to my childhood without the responsibiity.
Click to expand...

This is a major part of social phobia. Not feeling prepared to deal with issues emotionally, because there has been a lack of emotional affirmation and fulfillment growing up as a child. This affects everything from being disorganized, lack of rapport with other people, and excessive fear and lack of personal upkeep. This problem is detailed in a book called "Healing the Unaffirmed" by Conrad Baars. As I read through it, it was basically a summary of what social phobics suffer from. Highly recommend anyone to read it.
 
NP88

NP88

Well-known member
I prefer man-child. :p. Half seriously though, what is an adult, but a child lacking imagination. Someone who can be perceived as competent in society. Then what is society but a grownups world full of rules and proper ways to be. Growing up is overrated by my understanding.
 
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