Bullied because of yellow skin :(

[YellowVictim97]

I HATE MY LIFE!!!
Recently a girl from my class, Christine, started bullying me because of my skin colour. First, i thought it was a joke, but then the other students also began. They call me nasty words such as: Chinese, Shemale, Greenlander, Riceboy etc. Even my own teacher started calling me, Mr. Ching Chong. MY OWN TEACHER!!!
I've lived in peace for my entire life, but recently a wave of racism has come my way. And I don't know how to deal with it!

How do I deal with these bullies? Can I solve this without talking to my parents or the teachers?

Maybe if i talk to Christine, she could convince the others to stop?
Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[Remus]

Yes tell your parents and yes tell your teachers. Racism has no place in any school and is disgusting!

 

[PugofCrydee]

I agree racism has no place anywhere.

But I think when you speak up about the losers who are making fun of you, it could possibly only make things worse for you.

I can't really advise you what you should do, but personally I would wait until I came across one of the 'losers' when they where on their own, and I would get very, very close... and say 'if you bully me again.. I'm going to make you regret it. no one will be able to help you..'

and walk off.

 

[YellowVictim97]

I don't wish to tell my parents and my teachers, because then they would call me a snitch. I'm never becoming great friends with these people, but I still want to have an okay relationship. After all, I still need to spend time with them, 3 more years.

I don't think violence, threats and vengeance is the way to go. As my hero Gandhi once said: "Be the change you want to see in this world"

Ahh, can't wait to finish school and leave all this behind.

 

[Requiescat]

I can relate to this very much. I have olive skin tone, am half German and half Jewish, yet born in Africa. There were those who had a field day with all of that. Teachers can be totally inept in dealing with this too. In fact, I had significant trouble from all but one teacher in Primary School as far as thinly veiled racim is concerned. I was living in Ireland at the time. It also makes dealing with these people all the more difficult as things can escalate quite quickly into something quite sinister: burning houses etc. I cannot speak of your situation though, there are many variables I would need to consider before giving advice. But knowing who you are and what you value is important. Back then I resented myself, I felt ashamed of my heritage and everthing that made me different. It took a very long time to overcome these issues though, but now I'm at the point where I am very comfortable with myself and any sort of criticism leaves little impression on me. Total neutrality. So my greatest concern for you would be this, I'd hate for you to have to go through such a drawn out period of tortuous journey of self-acceptance.

 

[Graeme1988]

Aye, take Remus and Pug's advice. Yeah, most definitely. But here's my perspective...

Firstly, and most importantly, get that bellend of a teacher called out for their behaviour, report them to yer principal/head teacher.

That's sort of thing isn't on, like. I had a similar experience and the other staff at ma school thought I was lying.

The other bullies.... Well, you can try talkin' to the girl and tell her how hurtfully her remarks are being on you. But best probably to make sure you confront her and the any other bullies with a teacher present (one you trust, preferably). Though, don't be surprised if the bullies go into denial and start lying about the whole situation if you confront them with a teacher present. They tend to drop their front when a teacher catches them out.

But, as I said, get something done about that teacher as soon as you can.

You definitelly can't resolve this issue with the help of teachers, just make sure they won't dismissive of what yer sayin' and give you any of that "Oh, just ignore them" nonsense. That's just going encourage more bullying, since they'll know they're gettin' under yer skin.

Because they want a provocative reaction from you. They actually want you to overract and hit them. But the less violent response the better. Just start makes a joke of it, at their expense. Next time they call you those names, just go: "Uh-huh" in a dismissive, indifferent tone or with the shemale one go: "Are you, really? You know, you can't even tell. Well done with the transition".

Or you can either correct them on the "Chinese" or "Riceboy" insults. I'm guessin' you're Vietnamese or Korean? Sorry if I'm prying about yer ethnic background - no need to reveal that. Sorry, don't mean to pry. .:bigsmile: Or just tell them to toddle off ("walk away" in other words). Or you can replace the word "toodle" with a more sweary word starting with "F" and ending with "UCK" and keep the "OFF" bit.

And if it does get violent, just make sure they hit or attempt to hit you first. Then, it's self-defense. Preferably a slap, but just not too hard. But hopefully it doesn't come to that. And the Gandhi non-violent approach... :applause: :thumbup:

Teachers are there to help and show how resolve bullying situations, as well as educate you. The good ones, anyway. But some just couldn't care. And telling your parent would give you some extra support. There's absolutely no shame in asking for help in situations like this. Even if they think you're a snitch.

Best of luck to you.

 

[kilojoule]

:sad: I am so sorry you're going through this. I can't believe this stuff still happens. Tell your parents definitely, let them deal with the school. Your classmates and your teacher are behaving ignorantly and need to be educated. You should not have to experience this. I hope that this gets resolved quickly for you. Let us know what happens.

 

[Requiescat]

I would recommend going to the school board. Teachers are not adequate in their handling of the situation. It needs to be dealt with higher up. Especially if you already have trouble with a teacher, it may be more trouble.

@Kilojoule: UFF, UVF, UDA, CIRA, LVF, RHC, INLA. Just a tid-bit. Northern Ireland is heavily governed by Masonic groupings. It can make life very difficult to say the least.

 

[Megaten]

There's a girl in my class right now that told me recently she was bullied growing up because of her Asian decent, and now has bad anxiety as a result. I dont understand why people just cant not be aholes to each other.

 

[YellowVictim97]

Thanks a bunch for the great reply mates.
I followed your advice, and confronted Christine and told on my teacher.
Initially she was sorry, but the abuse unfortunately didn't stop there.
Beforehand, the bullying took place in the school, but now the bullies "do it" after school or in closed off locations, to avoid being caught. The teacher said sorry to me in class, and explained it was just a joke and he didn't think I would take it personally.

The good thing about confronting Christine was that the racial abuse stopped.
The bad part is, that because I "shared my feelings" the other boys now call me gay boy.
But I'm sure that will stop sooner rather than later. I even got sympathy from some of the girls, who have invited me to a birthday party . It's only a matter of time before the boys realise that they will lose respect from the girls if they continue.

Fascinating how skin colour can be such an important thing for some people. I've never been ashamed of my heritage. In fact I'm proud of being Japanese and proud of my culture. I don't even get mad when being called the previously named words, I get mad/sad because of their intentions. Those words, served no other purpose but to make me sad.

Again, I'm really thankful for the advice I've been given, it has made this a lot easier for me. But let's not count the chickens before they've hatched. This was only day one.

 

[Requiescat]

YellowVictim97, the same people who ridicule you now for being different - for a few measely years - will be spending the rest of their lives trying to find something unique about themselves when they are older. Have you ever noticed that the younger students gather in larger groups than the older? They find comfort in conformity whilst they are still developing, but as they get older they feel more secure as individuals. Though some truly imbecilic people never make it at all! LOL. You've found yourself a nice position of influence that will serve you well (you are far luckier than I was!). Keep us posted and all the best.

 

[PugofCrydee]

I don't think violence, threats and vengeance is the way to go.

Yea I wasn't suggesting you do what I wrote lol That's probably how I would handle weak minded people such as those.

People like those will partake in the mob mentality because it makes them feel included and part of the group. Basically they do what others are doing so they don't get singled out themselves. That sort of behavior is especially prevalent in the teenage/early adulthood years.

OK, if I was to give you my advice you have two options;

1) complain to the school board/teachers. This runs the risk of you becoming ostracized. In effect making things worse .

2) Ignore their taunts, and be friendly and helpful where you can. Especially when they are not in a group. This approach will be more difficult in the short term, but I believe most people will eventually stop bullying. They will see you are a decent person. Those without a conscious or low intelligence will continue to bully. You simply have to ignore them which I know will be tough.

I was the victim of severe bullying throughout school so I can sympathize with you.
In the end, do what you feel is right.
Good luck :thumbup:

 

[williamreinsch]

Talk to your parents and hopefully they will contact the school, a teacher joining in on racist bullying is a pretty big deal, they need to be fired. I hope you and your parents can work together to sort it out. Maybe even try to change schools if all else fails. Good luck

 

[kilojoule]

But I'm sure that will stop sooner rather than later. I even got sympathy from some of the girls, who have invited me to a birthday party . It's only a matter of time before the boys realise that they will lose respect from the girls if they continue.

yes! you're absolutely right they will lose respect and they'll realise this soon I hope

Fascinating how skin colour can be such an important thing for some people. I've never been ashamed of my heritage. In fact I'm proud of being Japanese and proud of my culture.

It's a wonderful heritage to have and it would only enrich their lives to learn a bit about Japanese culture. I hope to visit Japan in the future, my boyfriend was there for some time and he loved it & never stops talking about it sounds amazing

Again, I'm really thankful for the advice I've been given, it has made this a lot easier for me. But let's not count the chickens before they've hatched. This was only day one.

:thumbup: let us know how things go

 

[theslowesthand]

Fascinating how skin colour can be such an important thing for some people. I've never been ashamed of my heritage. In fact I'm proud of being Japanese and proud of my culture. I don't even get mad when being called the previously named words, I get mad/sad because of their intentions. Those words, served no other purpose but to make me sad

Just like wars, its ego-controlled ("us versus them", win or lose, etc), and there's seldom any real purpose other than ego-gratification.

 

[Sinopia]

This is really awful, but I'm not surprised by it. Cuz I'm Asian too and I've been through a lot of racist shit in all kinds of forms, even things that nobody would expect that it would happen to us. I would say talk your parents and talk with the principal. This teacher should get fired. Ppl are shit. These ppl deserve to rot in hell. Racism is the no. 1 reason why I'm socially awkward, cuz it ruined my life so badly. I have social phobia, cuz of these mother****ers. If I'm in my parents country, I feel totally relieved, but when I'm back in the Netherlands, I feel daily depressed again. I don't know in which country you live, but I would say move to your parents country or to a big country, such as canada where you can find more acceptance, cuz of multiculturalism. I can't wait to get the **** out of Europe. I wanna leave this continent for good. I have nothing to lose.

 

[THeCARS1979]

I HATE MY LIFE!!!
Recently a girl from my class, Christine, started bullying me because of my skin colour. First, i thought it was a joke, but then the other students also began. They call me nasty words such as: Chinese, Shemale, Greenlander, Riceboy etc. Even my own teacher started calling me, Mr. Ching Chong. MY OWN TEACHER!!!
I've lived in peace for my entire life, but recently a wave of racism has come my way. And I don't know how to deal with it!

How do I deal with these bullies? Can I solve this without talking to my parents or the teachers?

Maybe if i talk to Christine, she could convince the others to stop?
Any advice would be appreciated.

yeah all that is unacceptable, especially for a teacher , and for a teacher his behavior is outrageous

 

[Requiescat]

yeah all that is unacceptable, especially for a teacher , and for a teacher his behavior is outrageous

It's all too common unfortunately. It's like the policy "it takes two to start a fight", so they never make a distinction between an aggressor or a victim. They wash their hands having to deal with a situation. It is that one rare teacher who has common sense and decency in taking the effort to deal with the situation properly. Hence why I recommended going over their heads to people that only care about a school doing it's job adequately.

 

[Sinopia]

I HATE MY LIFE!!!
Recently a girl from my class, Christine, started bullying me because of my skin colour. First, i thought it was a joke, but then the other students also began. They call me nasty words such as: Chinese, Shemale, Greenlander, Riceboy etc. Even my own teacher started calling me, Mr. Ching Chong. MY OWN TEACHER!!!
I've lived in peace for my entire life, but recently a wave of racism has come my way. And I don't know how to deal with it!

How do I deal with these bullies? Can I solve this without talking to my parents or the teachers?

Maybe if i talk to Christine, she could convince the others to stop?
Any advice would be appreciated.

Dear YellowVictim97,

Sounds like you're from Denmark. Are you from Denmark? Because I find it remarkable that they call you Greenlander. In other countries they won't call you Greenlander that fast. I mean Greenland is part of Denmark, so it makes more sense.

Yours Sincerely,

Sinopia

 

[YellowVictim97]

Yes I'm from Denmark... And Greenlanders are associated with being drunk and homeless (not true ofc), so I don't like being called that.
If you've followed this thread, you've noticed that I haven't been writing anything on here for a while. But that's not to say that there haven't been any changes regarding the bullying.

For a couple of days it was all fine and dandy, I wasn't being bullied, I got invited to a nice birthday party, and my teacher apologized to me. Unfortunately, surtain events have changed everything. As you might know, a wave of immigrants has come Denmarks way. And here ind Southern Jutland, the population is very rascist. The children from Syria have been "forced" into my school in order to learn danish and our culture. And I kid you not, I have been forced to eat with them during lunch. They actually said something like this: "You can't eat here, go eat with the others weirdos!"
Firstly, I thought it was some kind of stupid joke, but then they actually pushed me away from the table.

Like wtf!?!? Suddently everyone is against me again? I've thought long and hard about this situation, and I really need to confront Christine again. This time I will be compelling!

Can't wait to leave this f*ing rascist country behind!