Article on Perfectionism

[lurknomore]

This doesn't talk about Social Anxiety (only mentions it as a potential disorder that perfectionists can suffer from), but I found it pretty interesting, and hit home for me in a lot of ways. Perhaps striving for perfection is one thing that could be at the heart of things like SA, OCD, AvPD, etc. Or it could be the opposite- a defense mechanism after you've already developed anxiety/depression. Thoughts?

http://www.ucdenver.edu/life/services/counseling-center/Documents/The-Perfectionists-Script-for-Self-Defeat.pdf

 

[MikeyC]

That is a long article. I do find it interesting that it was written in 1980.

Perfectionism will eventually lead you to be more unhappy because you'll never be satisfied with your eventual results.

In some areas of life, perfectionism can't be quantified, anyway.

 

[cosmosis]

I'm still reading through the article, but I think that perfectionism can certaintly cause all those problems. I think at the core of it, its just someone who is not comfortable with just being themselves and has a need to prove to the world that they can be something or do something great. Down that road is certainly social anxiety for some - like me. Looking back at my past, I had parents who were good people, but they never properly affirmed or loved me for who I was - which seemed to create a stronge sense of perfectionism. I always feel worthless if I fail at anything or if I'm not good enough at something. My brother and sister are the same way, except they are successful. They are highly sociable and end up being the best at everything they do. I'm focused on the pain, fixing the pain, etc, and I end up getting no where and avoiding everything.

 

[Imaginary]

That is a long article. I do find it interesting that it was written in 1980.

Perfectionism will eventually lead you to be more unhappy because you'll never be satisfied with your eventual results.

In some areas of life, perfectionism can't be quantified, anyway.

I guess I could call myself as a perfectionist, because I was never satisfied of what I do for my art works, yes, excessive of perfectionist make a person suffer.

When an artist felt they the greatest, they will lose their enthusiasm. Somehow I always jealous of the someone's works, if I think about it again, I could actually do that, but when I would start it and I was afraid and doubt my ability, because when I create something I always feel like a failure, why not me could be like them, if someone else said, I'm pretty proficient, but a sense of perfectionism that I have actually made ​​me scared to try the new.

I like being enslaved by my own lust.

Maintain for something more difficult than catch up.

 

[MikeyC]

I guess I could call myself as a perfectionist, because I was never satisfied of what I do for my art works, yes, excessive of perfectionist make a person suffer.

It must make it difficult to enjoy your art, then, if you're constantly striving for perfectionism.

When an artist felt they the greatest, they will lose their enthusiasm.

Absolutely. Where do you go from there? When you feel there's no more room for improvement (in your mind), it's hard to stay motivated.

 

[Aletheia]

I'm so afraid of getting it wrong, even slightly, that I can end up avoiding doing anything at all.

I don't know why I so strongly equate imperfection with unacceptability, but I do, and I'm fairly sure that the SA grew out of that, rather than the other way around.

I need to let myself make mistakes. I need to take myself less seriously.

 

[MikeyC]

I need to let myself make mistakes. I need to take myself less seriously.

I could apply this to my competitiveness, actually.

 

[montejocarlo]

didn't read the article ::

but i think it's the latter- defense mechanism. in my case for example, i want perfection because i can't handle criticism (SA talking). this had been one of my biggest problems in college. 1st, i couldn't leave the house without completing my morning rituals. result: i was always late for my 1st class in school. if i miss one those rituals though, i would feel more anxious than usual the entire day. 2nd, i had a habit of reviewing and reediting my essays over and over before i can submit them. result: i never passed anything on time (automatic minus points for tardiness). 3rd, i needed to have a presentation planned out perfectly before i can deliver. result: i never showed up when i'm not prepared (you get the picture).

all of those in the name of self-preservation- to protect myself from humiliation. it didn't do me any good, to say the least.

 

[hoddesdon]

The article says that perfectionism can lead to anxiety, which suggests that it is not a defence mechanism. It also says that it can lead to intolerance of disapproval.