Any positives out of it?

arsenalwa

Well-known member
Alright so, this is my first thread on here. Though I've been reading threads on this site for a while, I just registered yesterday with the idea of this thread on mind...

So, has any of you thought that SA actually had any positive effect on you, your personality, the way you look at life... I'm not so sure how to explain this. Like it made you feel people's suffering easily. Made you less rude and more nice than most people, a less of an a**hole, more careful about people's feelings, etc... That if you didn't have SA, maybe you would have been worse in some ways?

I hope you get the point.
 
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hey friend, welcome :)
Ya, I completely understand what you mean. My SA has definetely sensitized me. I am now much more aware of other people's feelings, and more sympathetic. I never really judge anyone the same way now, and always consider things from their point of view. It's also made me alot nicer, but it seems it's just a way for me to easily gain other people's acceptance (if that makes any sense). I can't really bring myself to criticise other's anymore. Although I view this more as a flaw now days...
 

Silvox Black

Well-known member
True intelligence only comes through true suffering. Were it not for my painful experiences and seething scorn from others, I would not have the knowledge or insight that I do today. While such suffering was painful, I suppose that it is the only way one can truly grow. I would not be the person I am today were it not for my trials through life. I understand what you are asking though, have any of us been bettered by our SA despite the pain?
 

Hellhound

Super Moderator
My issues made me more understanding of people and life in general, maybe more empathetic... Yes, it sucks to have all this mental chaos, but I'd rather be like this than being "normal" and ignorant.
 

206Raider

Well-known member
I thought about this too, I used to be kind of an asshole, now I'm good to everybody and I understand others pain easier and I'm just a much deeper person. But, while I'm glad I'm a good friend and human I would love to be happy and anxiety free and if I was an asshole but happy as ever I would have to consider taking it back lol.
 

Jonelle

New member
Hey everyone, Todays my first day on here!

I feel that its made me alot more sensitve and caring towards other people, but i also find that i care a little too much.
 

AimeeSP

Well-known member
Welcome to SPW. :)

Yep i totally believe that having social phobia has made me a more understanding, empathic person. I've always been shy so i've always been sensitive to others feelings and wanted to help. And ex friend of mine had the perfect upbringing, everything she wanted, demanded things and got them, was in with the 'it crowd' at school, and wow she is a right b*tch lol.
 
Definitely. I'm far more empathetic/caring, not into BS and everything has made me incredibly humble (even though I've never been conceited). I'm glad that you were able to see this side of SA.
 

arsenalwa

Well-known member
hey friend, welcome :)
Ya, I completely understand what you mean. My SA has definetely sensitized me. I am now much more aware of other people's feelings, and more sympathetic. I never really judge anyone the same way now, and always consider things from their point of view. It's also made me alot nicer, but it seems it's just a way for me to easily gain other people's acceptance (if that makes any sense). I can't really bring myself to criticise other's anymore. Although I view this more as a flaw now days...

Yea it absolutely does. I thought about it this way before too.
 

arsenalwa

Well-known member
True intelligence only comes through true suffering. Were it not for my painful experiences and seething scorn from others, I would not have the knowledge or insight that I do today. While such suffering was painful, I suppose that it is the only way one can truly grow. I would not be the person I am today were it not for my trials through life. I understand what you are asking though, have any of us been bettered by our SA despite the pain?

I totally agree with this. I think for all our suffering, it made us alot deeper. Like that girl you talked about, AimeeSP, she had everything she ever wanted, and now she is a b**ch to quote you lol. And there are so many people like that, And then any tiny problem would cause them so much trouble and make them so depressed and all, like how many of us found someone sooo depressed about a tiny stupid problem and thought to themselves like what about all the pain I feel all the time... You know I was watching an episode of "Lost" the other day and this part reminded me of all of this for some reason lol

[during a counseling course]
Locke: Francine feels a little too much if you ask me. You all do. I mean, seriously...? So-and-so never called me back, my mother stole thirty dollars from me" - I never even knew who my parents *were*. A couple years ago my birth mother found me and she told me - I was 'special'. And through her I met my real father - great news, right? Well, he pretended to love me just long enough to steal my kidney because he had to have a transplant! And then he dropped me back in the world like a piece of trash just like he did on the day I was born. YOU WANT YOUR DAMN THIRTY DOLLARS BACK? I WANT MY KIDNEY BACK!
 
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Emily_G

Well-known member
This is a question sometimes asked on the stuttering forums I attend. And I say "yes, stuttering has definitly made me a better person." I am more understanding, humble, etc.
 

Weirdo

Well-known member
Yes, it sucks to have all this mental chaos, but I'd rather be like this than being "normal" and ignorant.

Sorry to burst your bubble, but you wouldn't. If you never had SA/whatever else you have, you'd be much happier. Perhaps you'd even be already married, had 2 kids, a big house and a car and a shitload of friends. Also you wouldn't give a shit about people with mental illnesses, because they wouldn't be a part of your little happy ignorant(aka normal person's) world. But you can't blame normal people for being that way, it's instinctive behavior. They make allies with the strong and avoid or destroy the weak.

This goes for all who think they are a better person thanks to SA.
http://www.socialhallucinations.com/Unique.jpeg.jpg ..sad but true.
Sorry for being so negative.
 

dooby-duck

Well-known member
I think it has made me a lot more tolerant of other peoples beliefs and opinions. I think it has made me more understanding and sensitive to other people. I just have to be careful not to let other people walk all over me. I have to remember I can say no. I do stick up for myself a lot more these days.
 
Sorry to burst your bubble, but you wouldn't. If you never had SA/whatever else you have, you'd be much happier. Perhaps you'd even be already married, had 2 kids, a big house and a car and a shitload of friends. Also you wouldn't give a shit about people with mental illnesses, because they wouldn't be a part of your little happy ignorant(aka normal person's) world. But you can't blame normal people for being that way, it's instinctive behavior. They make allies with the strong and avoid or destroy the weak.

This goes for all who think they are a better person thanks to SA.
http://www.socialhallucinations.com/Unique.jpeg.jpg ..sad but true.
Sorry for being so negative.

You can't decide for him how he'd rather be.
 

Weirdo

Well-known member
I'm not deciding for him, I'm merely stating the facts. We can all think "oh life sucks and people suck because they are arrogant shallow jerks, but at least I'm unique, nice, caring and understanding." But do you think they think the opposite? Like "Oh darn, I am so happy and succesful and everybody likes me, I wish I could have some debilitating mental illness so I could be unique and alienated from society" Ofcourse not. If you're thinking you'd rather be the way you are rather than a normal happy person, you're just lying to yourself. It's just something we do to not feel as shitty about ourselves. Be rational.
 

mrb

Well-known member
yep your right , were all more nicer to people , than people in general ... id rather be like that than some cold blooded person who dont care about anyone but themselves
 

Silvox Black

Well-known member
Sorry to burst your bubble, but you wouldn't. If you never had SA/whatever else you have, you'd be much happier. Perhaps you'd even be already married, had 2 kids, a big house and a car and a shitload of friends. Also you wouldn't give a shit about people with mental illnesses, because they wouldn't be a part of your little happy ignorant(aka normal person's) world. But you can't blame normal people for being that way, it's instinctive behavior. They make allies with the strong and avoid or destroy the weak.

This goes for all who think they are a better person thanks to SA.
http://www.socialhallucinations.com/Unique.jpeg.jpg ..sad but true.
Sorry for being so negative.

Ha! You speak of ignorant bliss as a positive. Are you truly that deluded? You are entitled to your opinion but do not force it onto others. If you think that you are correct, the least you could do is put some damned effort into your words. You think being "normal" and ignorant is something good? Go join them then. None of us shall stop you. But don't prance around saying that everyone should listen to you. If you find you are happier being ignorant, that does not mean everyone will.
 

Silvox Black

Well-known member
I'm not deciding for him, I'm merely stating the facts. We can all think "oh life sucks and people suck because they are arrogant shallow jerks, but at least I'm unique, nice, caring and understanding." But do you think they think the opposite? Like "Oh darn, I am so happy and succesful and everybody likes me, I wish I could have some debilitating mental illness so I could be unique and alienated from society" Ofcourse not. If you're thinking you'd rather be the way you are rather than a normal happy person, you're just lying to yourself. It's just something we do to not feel as shitty about ourselves. Be rational.

It all comes down to opinion. Would you rather be with the society that is wrong and enjoy the benefits of conformity and acceptance or would you rather take the other path. Your way may or may not be correct and having a life of trouble and pain to reach knowledge may or may not be correct. You make a mistake in assuming that there is one correct way for rationality is inevitably influenced by opinion.
 

Hellhound

Super Moderator
Sorry to burst your bubble, but you wouldn't. If you never had SA/whatever else you have, you'd be much happier. Perhaps you'd even be already married, had 2 kids, a big house and a car and a shitload of friends. Also you wouldn't give a shit about people with mental illnesses, because they wouldn't be a part of your little happy ignorant(aka normal person's) world. But you can't blame normal people for being that way, it's instinctive behavior. They make allies with the strong and avoid or destroy the weak.

This goes for all who think they are a better person thanks to SA.
http://www.socialhallucinations.com/Unique.jpeg.jpg ..sad but true.
Sorry for being so negative.

And how can you be so sure I'd be like that? ::p: You don't know me, my environment, my country and my society. You don't know anything about my life and thoughts, so why are you trying to speak for me as if you knew me too well? This is precisely why I'd rather be ill than ignorant, because Ignorance leads to these kind of attitudes. Also, you might think this way, you might think it's right, but that doesn't mean that everyone else must think like you.
 
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