Speaking under pressure (work)....totally laid an egg!

lomez999

New member
First post here as I had such a bad experience yesterday. Of course, I guess as most do, I keep re-living it over and over in my head and feel just horrible.

First, I am in my 40s and have a good job....one where I'm in a position of leadership and therefore must portray an image of stretngth and being totally in-control. Ever since college, I knew I had a problem with speaking in public in any form. I recall many years ago at work, being in a conference room and just "going around the room to quickly introduce ourselves". It would be next to my turn to just say who I am, where I work and what I do.....and my heart would start POUNDING, I mean like 150 bpm and my blood pressure must have jumped to 200/150. Almost a medical emergency. At that point, I could barely even squeak out my name. It was HUMILIATING; but, I could sometimes sort of play it off.

Well, over the years, I've gotten better, and even have been able to speak in front of groups, etc. I also discovered beta blockers, which usually seem to help a LOT (whole other topic). Unfortunately, yesterday I was sort of put i a surprise situation where I was with a semi-new hire, and had to speak not only in front of a large room of customers, but also this new hire (who I am showing "how it's done") and even ALL OF MY COMPETITORS! I felt fine.....but then my turn came to talk about what we had for them.:eek: I stood up and went to the front of the room, introduced myself in a booming, strong voice....said who we were....and.....my heart started POUNDING. The more it pounded, the more I sort of freaked out inside. The more I freaked, the more it pounded. I am quite certain I looked, at the very least, like an idiot. I couldn't think....couldn't clearly even navigate what I was trying to say.....I ended up cutting things short and sitting down. But the damage was done. ALL my competitors in the industry saw this. My new hire saw this. I'm just so down on myself now. I know if I went back to do it again, it would be different....but, what's done is done.

Has anyone else had an experience like this, or had a quivering voice, dry mouth and obvious difficulty speaking affect their professional situation? Ugh....I wish I could stop re-re-re- thinking about this. Oh, and also (not trying to make this a medication post) I took metaprolol (beta blocker) 50mg. a couple hours prior. I don't know if it just didn't work or what happened; but, I am really confused how my heart raced, I turned red and couldn't think with 50mg of beta blocker in me /??:question::idontknow: But just wondering who else has had an experience like this. In public is one thing. At work is even worse as you are branded as "non-strong" and perhaps not a leader. At work, in front of your employee who you are training, and also in front of most of your competitors in the industry.....takes it to a new place. My god, did I just brand myself as the shaky, weak guy that everyone used to think was the big, strong leader type?? ugh
 
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Hot_Tamale

Well-known member
First of all, I'm sorry to hear what you've been going through. I've had similar troubles in college in the past when the professor would ask each of the students to introduce themselves to the class on the first day.

I don't have a quick fix for you and I'm sure you know how beta blockers work, they interrupt the function of a certain hormone. My guess would be your brain overrode the beta blockers in your system (kicked them out of the drivers seat so to speak) and kick started your body's flight or fight response. Beta blockers shouldn't have any effect on stimulation from the brain stem, unless you know something I dont.

I hope you can overcome this though with enough practice. Teach your body with positive reinforcement. That's just me spitballin' ideas here.
 
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