rodinski
Well-known member
What do I do now?
I have a severe case of OCD but by no means irrational nor delusional. There is this chick that believed I stalked her, went on an endless rant to our friends in common and ridiculed me for months to no end. I avoided this chick. Eventually she was upset that I was avoiding her. She started to sit around me, sit next to me, stare at me across the classroom, and talk about me, then later using "code names" such as a "lesbian lover" as her friends were sick of hearing it.
I was on medication at the time, stuff causing severe anxiety problems, muscle relaxation and tension, ejaculations caused by anxieties, deprivation, massive weight gain, psychotic rages, difficulty concentrating or understanding simplistic problems that I mastered the year before, EPS, and worse OCD symptoms (just to be told it was all my fault by my psychologist). Fundamentally I wanted to be left alone during being victimized for these ~7 months of being on medication.
I responded by insulting the living **** out of her in facebook messages every time I caught her hounding me. I tried removing common friends, let alone, a few of them sat there and degraded me constantly. She eventually threatened me with the school, her parents, and thus the law. I was scared ****less of going to school (my first year of engineering), and any means of interacting with her or her friends. But she continued to sit around me, continued to stare and this would continue onto the second semester.
I dropped out and the school wanted me back. They wanted to "make it work" for me. Got me out 1 of the 2 classes we had together. I was told she was hounding me. This chick again continued to sit behind me or make some means to be known if I didn't acknowledge her existence or avoided her. She eventually sat next to me and thus I reported this. They talked to her and she gave them the expression that she didn't want ANYTHING to do with me.
I continued to avoid her, this time, leaving the room entirely if she even entered. She continued to make a fuss in certain regards, or, sat behind me. Likewise, I was continuously being harassed by other friends stating I'm cruel, I'm a prick, *******, inconsiderate, and frankly: a problem (nothing invoked by me). So, I just gave up and left entirely.
Certain individuals started following me around, parking outside my house, messaging me on MSN, in the regards of "wanting to see me again", or they "miss me". I now have absolutely no friends except for a wonderful friend over in Italy (I'm in Canada) who is rarely online anymore because of her work schedule. Recently I started making friends or having old relations renewed (but again, work constraints or massive geological differences/time zones), and the only localized friend I have I....just....don't know anymore. I really don't want to be around him (heck, I'm typing this while we are on skype together; we'ved been good friends for the past 7+ years, and known each other since kindergarten and now he is going through more dumb rough times with a chick that left him). I've also finished my summer job (engineering lab technician), which I was told to be their most efficient (when compared to individuals that have been their for 5 years), very accurate in my analyses, and their best summer student ever. Even there I barely talked to anyone, only near the end, and regardless of the amount of "training" new individuals.
I have such massive social anxieties and I believe it is greatly linked to what has happened above. I'm going back to redo my first year and honestly can't wait, but now I'm fat, unkept, social anxieties through the roof, and I wouldn't be surprised that this chick is still there (I HOPE SHE ISN'T). I just started to see a councilor who basically told me what I said above was pointless. Let alone, I think I still like this chick.
I have a severe case of OCD but by no means irrational nor delusional. There is this chick that believed I stalked her, went on an endless rant to our friends in common and ridiculed me for months to no end. I avoided this chick. Eventually she was upset that I was avoiding her. She started to sit around me, sit next to me, stare at me across the classroom, and talk about me, then later using "code names" such as a "lesbian lover" as her friends were sick of hearing it.
I was on medication at the time, stuff causing severe anxiety problems, muscle relaxation and tension, ejaculations caused by anxieties, deprivation, massive weight gain, psychotic rages, difficulty concentrating or understanding simplistic problems that I mastered the year before, EPS, and worse OCD symptoms (just to be told it was all my fault by my psychologist). Fundamentally I wanted to be left alone during being victimized for these ~7 months of being on medication.
I responded by insulting the living **** out of her in facebook messages every time I caught her hounding me. I tried removing common friends, let alone, a few of them sat there and degraded me constantly. She eventually threatened me with the school, her parents, and thus the law. I was scared ****less of going to school (my first year of engineering), and any means of interacting with her or her friends. But she continued to sit around me, continued to stare and this would continue onto the second semester.
I dropped out and the school wanted me back. They wanted to "make it work" for me. Got me out 1 of the 2 classes we had together. I was told she was hounding me. This chick again continued to sit behind me or make some means to be known if I didn't acknowledge her existence or avoided her. She eventually sat next to me and thus I reported this. They talked to her and she gave them the expression that she didn't want ANYTHING to do with me.
I continued to avoid her, this time, leaving the room entirely if she even entered. She continued to make a fuss in certain regards, or, sat behind me. Likewise, I was continuously being harassed by other friends stating I'm cruel, I'm a prick, *******, inconsiderate, and frankly: a problem (nothing invoked by me). So, I just gave up and left entirely.
Certain individuals started following me around, parking outside my house, messaging me on MSN, in the regards of "wanting to see me again", or they "miss me". I now have absolutely no friends except for a wonderful friend over in Italy (I'm in Canada) who is rarely online anymore because of her work schedule. Recently I started making friends or having old relations renewed (but again, work constraints or massive geological differences/time zones), and the only localized friend I have I....just....don't know anymore. I really don't want to be around him (heck, I'm typing this while we are on skype together; we'ved been good friends for the past 7+ years, and known each other since kindergarten and now he is going through more dumb rough times with a chick that left him). I've also finished my summer job (engineering lab technician), which I was told to be their most efficient (when compared to individuals that have been their for 5 years), very accurate in my analyses, and their best summer student ever. Even there I barely talked to anyone, only near the end, and regardless of the amount of "training" new individuals.
I have such massive social anxieties and I believe it is greatly linked to what has happened above. I'm going back to redo my first year and honestly can't wait, but now I'm fat, unkept, social anxieties through the roof, and I wouldn't be surprised that this chick is still there (I HOPE SHE ISN'T). I just started to see a councilor who basically told me what I said above was pointless. Let alone, I think I still like this chick.
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