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  1. DukeOtakuNukem


    I have been feeling like shit recently, particularly today as I have had a terrible flashback about what has happened in Japanese class in September, and upon trying to enroll in a math class, I was reminded of the incident by the dean demanding papers from me before I can enroll at any class in...
  2. DukeOtakuNukem


    Not too long ago, I was afraid of human interactions of almost any type, but now I just combat this with saying "I am I'm Me" or "I am what I am, and that's all that I am" and so far its helped to boost self-confidence drastically. I still have quite a bit to go, but so far, this has helped to...
  3. DukeOtakuNukem

    Frequent Panic Attacks

    I'm having one right now, can't calm down, breathing heavily, what do I do?
  4. DukeOtakuNukem

    Perfected Steak

    I can't believe it!!! After all of these years of experimenting on grilling steaks, I FINALLY have managed to grill steaks perfectly with the diamond sear, and the authentic steakhouse taste! Just this has washed away everything I was ever upset about, because cooking is my secondary hobby aside...
  5. DukeOtakuNukem

    Can't Please Everyone

    I have come to the conclusion that pleasing others doesn't necessarily mean pleasing myself. Some people, like the Japanese "language exchange" partners I had cannot be pleased no matter how hard I try. It took me a lot of effort just to register to and put myself out...
  6. DukeOtakuNukem

    How Do You Cope With Being Disliked?

    Many people find ways to cope with certain things that have happened in the past. I have had some very bad recent experiences with people that has made me feel hated, and perhaps unimportant, so I deal with this by playing extremely violent games like Blood, God of War, or Postal 2. How about...
  7. DukeOtakuNukem

    Feel Like S**t

    Just yesterday, I have been blocked by yet another Japanese language partner. This shit has become so bad that I deleted my account, since I have had complete shitty luck trying to communicate with Japanese people; I am mainly unable to meet with them online, because of...
  8. DukeOtakuNukem

    Death/Black Metal

    Does anyone else here listen to death or black metal if either you feel unmotivated to do something, such as homework or learning social skills, or feel extreme vengeance towards a certain person and need an outlet like it?
  9. DukeOtakuNukem

    Gaming Nostalgia

    I was writing a journal about how angry I felt towards humanity, and then all of a sudden, a powerful, jolting feeling of nostalgia rushed towards me, relieving my childhood. It was back before I knew what depression or even autism was. Back when Sega was at its last breath, but still had...
  10. DukeOtakuNukem

    Friend in Distress

    My best friend has been threatened multiple times by his parents that he will get kicked out of the house if he upsets them again, and his parents even told him "You are not a child, you are a burden." and this is really worrying me as he is a great guy to me, and has brought a lot of joy...
  11. DukeOtakuNukem


    Recently, I have been finding myself not wanting to socialize with people anymore in fear of rejection, or being disappointed by the outcome of the interaction, and I have been just depressed to the point where I drink sake for several hours straight, attempting to forget about the pain of...
  12. DukeOtakuNukem

    Language Trouble

    I am currently trying to learn Japanese, but as I have described in earlier posts, I have been deleted and blocked by many, mainly because my skills are very poor, and I still don't know what to do to this day. I have invested quite a bit of money in books, but apparently, I am a "kinesthetic"...
  13. DukeOtakuNukem

    The Urge to Hurt People

    Of course I will not do what the title suggests, but I shouldn't be feeling this way either. It all started after a failed visit to the psychologist involving him insulting me, though I merely explained my struggle, and ever since then I fantasized about having revenge against him in the most...
  14. DukeOtakuNukem

    Hatred for Humans (Contains gruesome content)

    I have been living with extreme social anxiety since I was young, but it eventually developed itself into pure hatred for humans. I used to partake in something called "language exchange" to improve my Japanese, only to be blocked and deleted by more than half of native Japanese speakers I met...
  15. DukeOtakuNukem

    Staring Problem

    Unfortunately, ever since I have been hit many times back in grade school, I stare at people and take in all the surroundings in public places in fear of being attacked by someone across the street or store I am in, and not surprisingly I get frowned at very often, and now I am starting to feel...