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  1. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    Sorry, I don't mean to be rude to anyone. Again, I have a part time job at the moment. I don't want leave this thread on a bad note... but I don't wanna waste 20 more years living with my parents either. I'm too young to deal with so much stress. I feel like I exist in a vacuum. It's not a...
  2. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    I've told both my parents on many occasions about how their actions affect me and they continue to brush me off with "You're just sad" or "I don't know why you're doing this." When I opened up to my mother about my own depression, she gave me a flippant answer "Yeah, well so do I." Why should a...
  3. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    I'm 22 by the way
  4. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    Sorry. Just wanted to give an example anyways. No one deserves to suffer this much...
  5. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    Now look at this video. Same person. He and I somewhat both share some things in common with family trauma verbal abuse wise... still there's no excuse for this. PTSD is no joke. I can't stress that enough. Seems that it caused long term effects too.
  6. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    THIS. This is exactly how I feel. This is what chronic anxiety attacks are like for me. It's hard treading on water all the time.
  7. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    My dad says her night terrors are something I need to live with and I shouldn't let it affect me. OMG, this is living hell fo me! I'm not joking. It's a f#cking nightmare. What do you guys think??? Please, I really hate living with them. I always feel sad when I'm with them and their lack of...
  8. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    I don't know anyone my age who goes through so much trauma/stress all at once.
  9. FriendlyShadow

    Im gonna die soon.

    There's no hope for me anymore. I'm literally breaking apart as I write this. I doubt I'm gonna make it. I'm trapped with my parents forever and my anxiety has gotten worse and worse due to my Mom's night terrors at night which she can't get help for. No one knows how the terror I'm living...
  10. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    I'm very emotionally sensitive. I heard that dreams about going to the bathroom symbolize emotional release. I am compelled to agree that having trauma/depression increases the intensity of dreams.
  11. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    How many hours are you on it? Do you use it when you go to bed?
  12. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    I'm starting to wonder if I'm just naturally a lucid dreamer(though there are dreams where I'm not aware I'm dreaming.) Even to this day, I could tell you about a certain dream I had 10 years ago and remember almost exactly what it was about.
  13. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    Oh, and not to sound gross, but I have dreams about going to the bathroom a lot.
  14. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    I don't think I have REM sleep disorder.... I've never had any jerk movements upon waking up from a bad dream. I think maybe my vivid dreams have more to do with what I'm actually dealing with in life and that could make sense. The more repetitive my life is, the more I keep having those...
  15. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    One question: How often do you use your laptop? I try to dim the brightness on my cellphone to the lowest setting so I don't receive so much artificial blue light. Honestly, I'm afraid of my future and I have so much on my plate for someone so young. I don't think my family has any history...
  16. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    Before, when I worked at an earlier shift at Marshall's, I ALWAYS felt like I wanted to sleep despite how the fact that I did get a good amount of sleep including naps. My eyelids would start drooping and as soon as I came home I'd fall straight to bed. Now, I don't feel tired like I used to...
  17. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    I've noticed that when I have slept, I'm a lot less anxious then when I tried to fall asleep the first time. I tend to keep waking up in the middle of the night too and sometimes that can make it harder to go back to sleep.
  18. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    I don't know, maybe it's possible I'm a light sleeper
  19. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    I'm taking natural supplements, plus medical marajuana to treat my anxiety. Though, vivid dreams are nothing new to me. There are certain scenarios in my dream that I can remember very well if I give myself a few minutes to think about it. Sometimes, I felt like I had slept when it doesn't...
  20. FriendlyShadow

    Can herbal tea cauae vivid dreams?

    But wouldn't that mean more like you're resting though? I've always wondered why I was able to remember my dreams all the time.
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