put your OCD in perspective

i am trying to reason with my OCD.
why ihave it. why it is all around the same thoughts all the time
i came to a conclusion, all though i don't know how true it is, I remember before my OCD i heard of a guy who decapitated a sleeping man on a bus.
and i was thinking about that for a long time, maybe a week, then i read a book on killer,s and bam it started. but all my thoughts are neck related, as decapitation would be, also if my mind sees sleeping it thinks of taking advantage.
and the serial killer book would have brought on the rest of my intrusive thoughts.

do you guys have a story that falls into place like that too?

what do you do to deal with intrusive thoughts?

hmm that would be your.. trigger. My trigger was some dude asking me if I had a problem with my sexuality.. So.. Guess what.. Most of my OCD related issues revolve around sex/sexuality.. It's progressed to other things.. but mainly about sex/sexuality.

I used to panic a lot about the thoughts.. but.. I've sort of become numb to them.. I still have the thoughts and things but I'm not nearly as panicked as I used to be. The thing to keep in mind is that your thoughts are normal, you just happen to obsess over them.. That doesn't make you wrong or bad.. It just makes it more stressful for you.

it's just terrible when your cuddling with your girlfriend and you et thoughts to break her neck.
it's dulled me, i don't have fun any more. i can't drink, i can't go with friends i try not to do anything that could impare my awareness to my OCD
i'm too afraid. and i am too afraid to try cognitive therapy, because what if it's not OCD and i do something so bad not even God would forgive me...

Dan you are letting the OCD win. You have to realize ITS FAKE. OCD is called the doubting disease for a reason... have you noticed EVERY OCD obsession revolves around series' of "What ifs"? That is because with OCD obsessions it is impossible to ever get a definitive concrete answer to the question.... Whether it be sexuality, murder, cleanliness, etc etc you can always trigger a spike by asking yourself "What if"....

I walk around daily with the stupid ass question "What if I'm gay" running through my head constantly. Absolutely nothing triggers this, no history of homosexuality and no desire for it but the OCD just puts this stupid 'what if' thought into my head and it BOTHERS me. But I have slowly but surely learned it is a bunch of ****ing bullshit.

But that's the irony of the disease right there... do you remember who you were and how you felt before the question ever came up? That is your definitive concrete answer.

Go to therapy if you need to. Don't let the 'what ifs' scare you from taking action; you have to ****ing fight this bullshit.

I really, enjoyed reading this post, i found it rather empowering.
And i want to take action, I raly do, althoughi am scared to shit.
I will go to a therepist soon, first chance i get will be in a few months, I Hope that if i have a theripist giving me a push i can achieve a victory.
But i feel that by myself i am too little to compat this Giant.

durda_dan said:

it's just terrible when your cuddling with your girlfriend and you et thoughts to break her neck.
it's dulled me, i don't have fun any more. i can't drink, i can't go with friends i try not to do anything that could impare my awareness to my OCD
i'm too afraid. and i am too afraid to try cognitive therapy, because what if it's not OCD and i do something so bad not even God would forgive me...

Click to expand...

Yeeeea I don't have a lot of fun anymore either.. Cause.. I over-analyze every action.. Well, I don't as much as I used to.. Though all that over-analyzing has left its mark.

I have heard that most people get OCD from growing up in chaos and needing to feel control of some things. I also know it gets worse in times of stress, and I am in a really stressful part of my life right now.
As far of dealing with intrusive thoughts.. I am awful at it and they get me really depressed sometimes, but I just keep telling myself that it will get better and that I don't really want to do these things. I also try to tell myself every night that it will all be ok, nothing bad will happen.

durda_dan said:

I really, enjoyed reading this post, i found it rather empowering.
And i want to take action, I raly do, althoughi am scared to shit.
I will go to a therepist soon, first chance i get will be in a few months, I Hope that if i have a theripist giving me a push i can achieve a victory.
But i feel that by myself i am too little to compat this Giant.

Click to expand...

If you don't face the fear it will just get worse and worse

durda_dan said:

it's just terrible when your cuddling with your girlfriend and you et thoughts to break her neck...

Click to expand...

Ed Kemper, notorious serial murderer, was a bit like that. He said, "Sometimes I see a girl and I think I'd really like to get to know her, perhaps even have a relationship with her. Other times I wonder what her head would look like on a stick."

I wonder if he had OCD. Then again, I doubt OCD would compel you to have sex with headless corpses.

Perfidion said:

Ed Kemper, notorious serial murderer, was a bit like that. He said, "Sometimes I see a girl and I think I'd really like to get to know her, perhaps even have a relationship with her. Other times I wonder what her head would look like on a stick."

I wonder if he had OCD. Then again, I doubt OCD would compel you to have sex with headless corpses.

Click to expand...

Wow that is a really scary thing to say...

Ed was a scary guy. Looked a bit like Herman Munster with a moustache, but he was apparently really smart and generally quite gentle... when he wasn't butchering people that is.