past/present relationship's - SP/SA.

xkiss_me_nowx

Well-known member
i'm entirely sure how to put this.. but eh i was thinking last night..
how have all youre past relationship's been? or.. if youre in one now, how is it? do they know about your sp? and how does the sp effect your relationships??

i just thought id make a thread on it..
 

Emma

Well-known member
A relationship that I had turned nasty, he got really bossy and decided he had the right to tell me how to eat, what to eat, what to wear and what I should say......and then he got really physically violent, if I had the guts to stand up for myself i don't think it would have happened
 

COALPORTER

Well-known member
Geeez?? I though SP was the whole reason I can't even get into
a relationship.?? I'm so confused .! :?:
 
COALPORTER said:
Geeez?? I though SP was the whole reason I can't even get into
a relationship.?? I'm so confused .! :?:


SA does make it more difficult, but definately not impossible, a lot of people with sa have relationships, just don't give up hope =)
 

xkiss_me_nowx

Well-known member
well for me, i can always easily get a guy with my looks.. but if im not entirely comfortable with them [ive only been entirely comfortable with certain guy-friends who i was with in the past but finished with them because, well i only liked them as friends] and if im on a date or something for the first with a guy i like.. im shy, and quiet.. and then i am with the next date.. and the date after that, slightly get louder, but still quiet.. until i can entirely feel comfortable with them.. so it's like it take's them a while to get that "spark"..

my last bf dumped me bcoz he said he couldnt find the spark between us both.. we'd been on 5 dates...
i just don't think guy's are patient like that these day's
 

Danfalc

Banned
Ive not had any for the past like year cos while not technicaly in a propa relationship i really care for someone.But the relationships i have had have been a total disaster.. my sp has been taken advantage of.. used against me and with being a soft touch i pretty much got walked all over in pretty much every one i had.

So yeah im no george clooney but i get a bit of attenion every now n again..but what generaly happens is i get with a girl and she just treats me like shit and plays mind games with me,and cos of how insecure i am i kinda dont realise it and think ive done somthing wrong and dont stand up for myself.Ive been used for money..used cos i have a flat and even for sex which really hurt,and generaly get my life screwed over for a bit untill they get bored.Or the girl realises she cant cope with what she has taken on with me..(which is fair enough i guess) and then sorta everything i do gets thrown back in my face and she splits up with me blaming everything on me.


So umm haha yeah not exactly stuff of fairy tales :D But partly some of it was my fault.. the fact that girls were intrested in me was like wow.. and kinda of a suprise cos of how i felt about myself,so i would think im lucky this girl likes me and would get into a relationship cos of how lonley i was,without really thinking if i was well enough for a relationship... if i could cope with it or without really taking my time to get to know the person first.And i kinda fall for people quickly 2 which doesnt help.So yeah my sp doesnt help matters i dont think,but more so i reckon ive just been unlucky with the people ive met.
 

Broken_Memory

Well-known member
I've only ever had one 'relationship', but it couldn't go anywhere because eventually I began to feel as though I wasn't good enough. So I'd get more and more quiet around this guy, until I couldn't be around him anymore without getting totally paranoid that he was thinking 100% negatively about me.
 

Kinetik

Well-known member
I'm always somewhat limited in the activities I can do with girlfriends. It's mainly family gatherings that I have to bail on. I'm also not into the bar scene, so if she's big on partying, it usually doesn't work out. I don't enjoy rowdy crowds that you get at concerts and such either, so those aren't great for me. These are the first sort of problems that emerge on the surface, but there are deeper (recurring) ones too. The two main ones that come to mind is that I have a very hard time living with someone, and that I don't have much of a sex drive. I was kind of serious with my last girlfriend, and these were problems. She felt that I disliked her and was unable to commit because I wasn't able to live with her (avoidancy/space issues), and she became increasingly unconfident in herself because I often wasn't in the mood to make love. So yeah, that'll kill things I guess.
 

testobot

Well-known member
Most of my past relationships have been terrible. I love strong and outgoing women, but they have all dumped me for not being outgoing and talkative enough or not impressing their friends, etc. Also, I usually have settled on dating a woman who choose me. The last one cheated on me 4 times that I know of. Out of all 6 of my past relationships, I only worked up enough nerve to ask one out 8O ... I do feel lucky to have at least been in a relationship with women though... both physical and social... many men with SA never have either.

Currently I am dating a woman who is very beautiful-- physically but especially mentally... she is such a nice, open-minded and caring woman. I feel so fortunate.
 
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