Och aye the noo

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
I love quotes. This is a good one that I haven't seen before. I assume it is saying whatever we do we are gonna be criticised so just get used to being criticised. A good message, even though its easier said than done for some of us that are not thick skinned.

Well, aye, that's pretty my take on it, too. Yer going to get judged regards of what you say or do. So, just learn to deal with it. As you said, easier said than done for some of us that are not thick skinned.

Or, in ma case, being of mixed race and disabled. Which comes with it own pitfalls as far as judgements go. But people tend to avoid me, anyway, so cannae blame 'em. Ir's sad, but that the way it seems to be...

Though, it's more difficult to avoid being judged nowadays. Since most people, at least from my experience, tend to make up their minds and believe their right, without any consideration as far as yer perspective or context of what yer sayin'.
Which is why ah tend to stay away from Facebook. :bigsmile:
 

SpaceTime

Well-known member
I am sure you are right about the disabled thing as Ive seen it happen with someone in my wider family, where they get left out. I dont know what that is all about. The race problems I think probably differ by where you go, bigger more cosmopolitan cities are better I think than some of the smaller towns out in the middle of nowhere, where there isn't much interaction with people beyond their own community. They get very insular. In fact thinking about it, those smaller towns I've been to tend to be weird with people no matter what race, religion or background they have!

I'm a facebook avoider too. Cant stand it.
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
I am sure you are right about the disabled thing as Ive seen it happen with someone in my wider family, where they get left out. I dont know what that is all about. The race problems I think probably differ by where you go, bigger more cosmopolitan cities are better I think than some of the smaller towns out in the middle of nowhere, where there isn't much interaction with people beyond their own community. They get very insular. In fact thinking about it, those smaller towns I've been to tend to be weird with people no matter what race, religion or background they have!

Aye, the feeling of being left out or left behind is quite common with disabled people. I'm kinda baffled by it as well. Like disabled folk are somehow inferior because of their disability. Though, I've probably picked the wrong word there, saying "inferior"? Even if I feel like that myself sometimes.

Needless to say, as far as the race issue goes. Well, the town where ah live in the peaceful but boring Scottish Borders is - to quote my oldest sister:

"...very suspect 'o people who are no fae aboot here"

Which just makes me, someone who wus raised but not born there, feel like more of an outsider. Probably doesnae help that there's no many folk who are mixed like me living in the town, either. :idontknow:

I'm a facebook avoider too. Cant stand it.

My Facebook account was setup by ma sisters who pretty much browbeat intae joining. :kickingmyself: Despite me tellin' them ma life isn't all that interesting or worth talking about. At least, not in terms of my day to day life. To be honest, the times I do go out are pretty rare. Ah don't go out clubbing or gettin' drunk, or the likes. So, I'm kinda boring in that respect.

Concerts and comedy shows are about the extent of it, really. Even those are becoming fewer and fewer with accessable tickets being harder to buy, unless yer lucky. Or ye happen to be local to where the gig is, then you've got the added option of booking at the venue.
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Been feelin' quite depressed lately. Mainly due to huvin tae bare the weight of responsibility. Since ma mum just refuses to do anythin' to help herself and her hoarding habit. Never listens to me, but then, she never has...

I'm seen as being unstable for getting mad at her - because "Oh, she cannae help it. It just how she is" Is that what we've come to, is it? Folk who'd rather live in denial, than get the help they need. As if ignore a problem suddenly means it doesnae exist? That's how ma family is.

So, buying shitty food that's bad for ye in bulk every week, that's normal for a household with only 2 inhabitants? Nae wonder I've lost weight, since last year.

But wouldn't you lose yer rag if you hud tae put up with constantly being laugh at for simply giving honest advice, which is basic common sense more than anything? :veryangry: And ye get called a bully for offering constructive criticism. It's always the men that huv tae suffer, innit?

But a single parent projecting her own hateful views, ill-informed opinions n' personal insecurities - as f**ked n' backwards as they might be - onto her children. Well, that's just "good parenting", innit?

Would ah be seen as a bad person if ah just left home, abandoned ma family n' livin' in the middle of nowhere alone? :question:
Gotta dream, I suppose...
 
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Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Ah think ah'll just give up... :thinking:

Might as well, since naebuddy likes me, and folk tend to take an instant dislike tae me just on looks alone. Y'know being a big brown fella with a beard. White folk typically assume I'm a Muslim. In Scotland, where atheismh has a higher percentage than the rest o' the UK.

But, anyway, ma family seem to push me away when ah offer to help tae help or try to be helpful in someway. But, it a different story when ah refuse their help. :idontknow: Though, they tend to be more forceful and just assume that help is a given. Whereas ah prefer to ask or tell them how I'm going help... Manners, eh? They get ye naewhere in the end - at least in ma experience.

So, that aboot it. I'm probably just going to stop offering tae help ma family in future since they rarely return the favour. Though, offin' masel' does seem like a plan. I'm just a deid weight, like. A burden and an inconvenience.

Ah mean it's no like ma family would missing me, since ah spend maist 'o ma time tryin' tae go unnoticed anyway.
 
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Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
On a more positive note, ah've got tickets for some music concerts n' comedy shows that'll take me up until Christmas. Doesnae seem like much. But at least it get away from this shithole toon which ah live in for a wee while. Och, it's summit tae live for, innit? If nowt else...
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Ah wish ah dinnae huv tae reply upon ma family as much. They always seem to let me down, constantly belittling me when ah pluck up the nerve to be assertive. Callin' me an arsehole for forcing them to stay true to their word when they tell they'll do somethin' for me.

Ah mean ah don't huv much trust in ma family as is, since they always tend to be driven by their own ego. As far as being helpful goes, thinking how it'll make them look. Since they enjoy reminding me how much of a c**t I am, for simply tryin' to be helpful.

But whit do ah know, eh? I'm usually 99% of the time anyway. Am I being unfair here? :question: Doesnae seem that unreasonable does it? To expect someone to keep their word if they make a promise to do somethin' for you? :idontknow:
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Ah don't know what to do with ma life. Time seems to runnin' out for me in many ways. :sad: Kinda got cheated outta being "normal" by huvin such a shitty, strict, sheltered upbringing. Which I'm still suffering for because ma mum's clinging to me as if I'm supposed to be her primary carer. When ah don't want that responsibilty, as ah huv a hard enough time lookin' after myself.

Definitely got left behind as far as education goes, but that's somewhat typical for the likes o' me, y'know?

Don't feel as though I've truly lived ma life, just merely existed. Went along with the advice of family because there's naebuddy in ma family who can give sensible advice, except me. And I've never been great at makin' choices based off common sense. Always on impluse because ah feel pressure intae it.

Cannae help but feel lookin' back on ma life, that a father figure would've done me a world o' good, especially in ma younger years. Because ah feel like I've just been gettin' through life by lookin' at how other people are, and not taking any risks. Funny what instilling a fear and mistrust of people will do to ya, innit?
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Ma concentration and focus is really going as of late. Huv'nae even had the time to read a book at the moment. And used to love doing that, but cannae focus at all. :idontknow: And another things that's bothered me for the past few days is the fact the physiotherapists who help with ma recovery huv'nae been in touch for over 3 months now. Cause ah stop going to the rehab clinic near the start of July.
Don't know if they want to see me again, afore ma next consultancy hospital check-up in November? :question:
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Ah really don't get ma family, like, ataw... :idontknow:

Whenever ah make a suggestion to go somewhere they always dismiss me. But if it's them suggesting going tae the very place ah wus wantin' tae go, they're surprised when ah actually agree. :confused: :eek:h:
 

defiance

Well-known member
Ah really don't get ma family, like, ataw... :idontknow:

Whenever ah make a suggestion to go somewhere they always dismiss me. But if it's them suggesting going tae the very place ah wus wantin' tae go, they're surprised when ah actually agree. :confused: :eek:h:

Hmm...that is kind of weird. I mean do they just not remember that you already mentioned the same place they want to go?
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Hmm...that is kind of weird. I mean do they just not remember that you already mentioned the same place they want to go?

Yeah. Get the same excuses everytime as well...

"Oh aye, that's right! Sorry, ah'd forgot you'd mentioned it"
"Ma memory's going, ha!

:kickingmyself: It's really frustrating because it makes me not want suggest anything, or speak up general, since they never listen to me. So, ah just keep to masel' n' go unnoticed.

Though, the worst thing about those excuses is that ah cannae tell if they're being genuine or just BS. Since ma family tend to lie to me a lot.

And it's hard enough on me huvin to fend for masel', let alone huvin to remember things ah've said, like a few days or weeks. Ma memory's not that great either. Y'know, despite not spending as much time doing being lazy - like my mum tends to be. Though, she's only like this with me. :confused: Which is quite a clear indictation of how our relationship has been over the years.

Anyway, I'm rambling on now, better end this post. :bigsmile:
 
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Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, ah finally picked ma electric guitar for the first time in over 10 years. Got some guitar amp/effect software installed and running on my Mac. And... I f**kin' suck at the guitar. :crying: Forgotten every single techique ah hud master by the time ah turned 16.

Wish ah'd learned about the technical side o' thing when ah wus starting to play 14 years ago, because ah huv'nae got a clue as tae dialling in the tone n' aw that. :idontknow:

Not being adept at music theory doesnae exactly help matters. Feels great to get back into it, but kinda sucks that I've got so much to teach myself again. Also need a better guitar if ah ever want to play metal songs. Like yer really thrashy, distorted stuff like Megadeth n' Slayer. Fender just isn't up to par for me, as far as playing that style.

And I need a pedalboard and a MIDI interface to switch between clean and distorted. So a few things to save up for going into next year.
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, supposed ah'd better give a wee update on masel'... Since ah huv'nae really done that, lately. And finally tell the story of how ma surgery went and ma stay in hospital.

So, eh, ah dinnae want tae seem like I'm gettin' ahead o' masel', since am no a doctor or nuthin'. But... ah think ah might be back to fiull fitness.
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Ah mean I'm only going by the fact I can now walk barefoot without any pain, or feelin' like ma legs will buckle under me with every step.

Ma legs are still a bit stiff gettin' up in morning, like. But no as bad as they were following ma operation.

Huv'nae really been workin' out as much, in terms of exercises. But I'm tryin' to cut back on ma sugar n' salt intake. Which is difficult, considering how much junk food my mum tends to buy on impluse.

And I'm heading back to Edinburgh this week and Carlisle the following Thursday to see a couple of comedy shows. I'm a wee nervous about the Edinburgh gig, though - being 3 rows from the front. :eek:mg:

Also, ma eldest sister has suggested ah start writing a blog, but ah don't really know aboot that. Ah don't really huv much to say. :idontknow:
 

Louco

Well-known member
Also, ma eldest sister has suggested ah start writing a blog, but ah don't really know aboot that. Ah don't really huv much to say. :idontknow:

This thread could be considered quite the blog if I ever saw one.

It would probably be better to not show it to your family though. :p
 
About the guitar, i think the most important thing is to enjoy playing songs that you like. No matter how good ye are, if it feels good to play, then thats good enuf.

I suck at guitar also. Just cant seem to find my "style" or "niche". Also usually cannae be arsed to pick the thing up. So i guess im just waitin for the urge to play it to arise, then i'll find the songs i have saved in ma browser, and then attempt again to play them. At this rate it'll take years to become any good at any song, but who cares eh, as long as slight progress is being made, or at least i can find enjoyment from playing. But im always fighting ma perfectionism, either all or nothing, so its nae easy for me.

And i sure wont bother buying an electric guitar, as its likely to sit in a corner never bein played (i have this habit of having a "great" idea -> buying sth -> never using it). Ah'd have to be 100% sure i'd use it .. the proof being if i start playing the acoustic regulalry. But even then i'd be scared to buy the wrong guitar, etc & wasting ma money.
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
This thread could be considered quite the blog if I ever saw one.

It would probably be better to not show it to your family though. :p

Aye, in baith cases yer definitely right. :bigsmile:

Though, even if ah did show ma family this blog/thread they'd still say ah wus wrong to bemoan how they treat me at times. Since, they seem tae get aw self-righteous if ah question them or call them on their behaviour, instead of apologising and amending how they act. :eek:h:

But then ah've always thought ma family were no right in the heid. :giggle:
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
About the guitar, i think the most important thing is to enjoy playing songs that you like. No matter how good ye are, if it feels good to play, then thats good enuf.

That's very true. :thumbup:

I suck at guitar also. Just cant seem to find my "style" or "niche". Also usually cannae be arsed to pick the thing up. So i guess im just waitin for the urge to play it to arise, then i'll find the songs i have saved in ma browser, and then attempt again to play them. At this rate it'll take years to become any good at any song, but who cares eh, as long as slight progress is being made, or at least i can find enjoyment from playing. But im always fighting ma perfectionism, either all or nothing, so its nae easy for me.

Well, ah used to be quite good at playing the guitar. Used to know quite few Metallica and Iron Maiden songs when ah first started out - as far as rhythm guitar goes. Like, ah used to able to play parts songs by Maiden. And had the James Hetfield's chugging rhythm techique down and could play his parts in songs like Creeping Death, Sad But True and Enter Sandman up to tempo.

And when ah wus just teaching myself after I'd quit taking lessons, I'd learnt the opening section of Xanadu by Rush.

Wus always scared shitless of learning guitar solos, both in terms of learning full songs and improvising. Since ye cannae exactly afford to botch those when doing a cover. And the music theory and production side o' things escaped me.

Ah wouldnae say I'm a perfectionist when it comes playing, but I'm always messing with ma amplifer settings trying to get a decent tone. And the only thing put me off recording is not huvin an ear for sound engineering.

Though, ah wouldnae say I've got a "niche" or "style" that I like per say. I'm just as comfy playing songs that are more straightforward, like Green Day, Blink 182 or even Avril Lavigne's earlier songs.

But kinda like the challenge of playing more complex stuff, even if ah don't huv the theory or techiques mastered. Yer kinda learning as ye go in that regard.

And i sure wont bother buying an electric guitar, as its likely to sit in a corner never bein played (i have this habit of having a "great" idea -> buying sth -> never using it). Ah'd have to be 100% sure i'd use it .. the proof being if i start playing the acoustic regulalry. But even then i'd be scared to buy the wrong guitar, etc & wasting ma money.

I'm kinda the opposite, since ma main motivation for buyin' summit to get use oot of it. That said, my bagpipe chanter is just sitting there and ah bought that months ago. Still huv'nae gotten round to taking lessons for it. And I've got a mandolin which ah've yet tae learn how to play properly.

As far as buying a guitar goes, don't make the mistake of going on the look alone. Ah've bought a couple guitars in the past and ended up selling them, because ah never took how they sounded into account.

But there's no wrong guitar as such, unless yer going for a lesser known brand. That where ye kinda run into the guitars that may or may not sound great. Particularly on the electric guitar side of things.

It really depends what yer going for, and how much yer willing to spend. Ah just tend to go with brand names because they get good write ups. And if someone for one of ma favourite bands uses them, to me that reflection on the quality.

Though, ye don't have to go with those signature model guitars. To me, if it's the same brand and has similiar specifications, that's good enough, y'know? Between £200 to £300 is usually my spending limit. Only go higher if it's a must-have and you really want that specific signature guitar model. And ye cun afford it, obviously. Be it, the exact guitar that Kirk Hammett uses, or Dave Mustaine or Joe Satriani.

Guitar effect pedal and amplifer modeling software has saved me a shit tone on pedals. Though, I'm still going to get a wah-wah pedal, just tae a wee bit control over my guitar tone. Plus, rocking the foot back n' forth gives me a bit of exercise. :bigsmile:

Sorry, I'm rambling on, umn't ah? :giggle:
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, ah huv'nae been up to much, lately.

Me n' ma sister went up to Edinburgh Friday night, there, to see Scottish comedian-cum-magician Jerry Sadowitz at the Kings Theatre. Which was both brilliant and utterly terrifying. Sitting just 3 rows from the front. Terrifying only because his of humour is basically yer typically loud, angry, ranting Glaswegian.
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^ That joke's only a sample, he says far worse than that. And his opening routine usually sets the tone for the rest of the show. So... Not the kinda gig you'd bring yer mother along to.

And he uses the word "c-u-n-t" better than most other Scottish comedians, in that it's not as forced, y'know? Well, it is because he's got the aggression behind it. To be honest that's probably the word he used most liberally on-stage the other night. But it wasn't done to shock. Och, it's hard tae explain if yer no Scottish... There's just summit aboot that Glesga accent that makes the swearing become poetic in a way.

Though, with exception of his taking the piss outta Tim Pecke, the British astronaunt. With Sadowitz arguing that if yer gonnae spend aw that money tae send some c*^% into space, at least make it more entertaining for our sake. Like a couple o' Scots - a staunch Protestant and a hardcore Catholic - drunkenly fightin' over a fish supper at zero gravity. :bigsmile: But most of his jokes are way too offensive and sick to repeat out loud. Like we're talkin' politically incorrect, nothing is off-limits stuff.

Oh, and someone had a pretty huge laughing fit to the point where they were struggling to breath at one point. Though, Jerry didnae stop the show once he noticed it, he rather cruel made it part of the show by saying:

"Is somebuddy huvin a heart attack a few rows back? If so, that's great. Cause ah need aw the press attention ah cun f**kin' get at this point, y'know?"
 
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