Obession on the verge of killing me

A friend

Well-known member
Does anyone know how I can grab control of my mind and just relax? I've been forcing thoughts and desires out of my mind, and I almost threw up last night

because I've been trying to think and feel nothing but happy thoughts...And although this I got the positive thoughts and feelings in my head, I just feeling sick from all the stress I'm getting from it...
::(:
 

planemo

Well-known member
Is there anything in particular you're stressing about? When I was in my panic phases, almost nothing could stop my mind from racing. But being around nature can help. Pity I live in a dangerous city, so I'm limited to just seeing the trees outside and just watching the clouds or the birds, and just observing them makes me feel a bit better. If you can take a walk and sit in park away from the noise and just observe, it may help.
 

A friend

Well-known member
Half of it is coming from trying to become asexual and trying to eliminate my need for a significant other (and I do not live in a dangerous city).
 

planemo

Well-known member
Well I just accepted my fate of being alone, forever. But I don't think focusing on how to become asexual will help. It will only remind you more of what you are giving up. Something that will distract you from feeling alone is better to focus your attention on, although I know from personal experience it's pretty hard. And since you don't live in place like me, try to get out more by walking and being around nature.
 

DespairSoul

Well-known member
Hello,

I guess u should go more out if u are able do it. More exercising, doing what u love,
read books,watch movies,cook, meet some new people or your mates if u have some.
I dont know how much SA u are if only relation is your strongest desire or other values
too. Is many people what are alone and they fight with this also just like u. Dont try to
force u be asexual u cant anyway be thats something what is natural by people,
they dont feel desire be with other person intimly but u feel desire thats mean u cant be asexual
u can only call your self like that because u arent having sex but not coz u dont wish
is big diffrence like between apple and banana.
 

A friend

Well-known member
It's not really about sex, I just wanted to eliminate the need for love, because I don't have enough confidence to go out and try to find someone. I sort of feel like all the women are taken...And that's why I'm trying to get rid of wanting love.

I mean, I got rejected even on the internet, and that's even worse for me, because that makes me think that the opposite gender sees me as some sort of disease walking through the world...
 

DespairSoul

Well-known member
It's not really about sex, I just wanted to eliminate the need for love, because I don't have enough confidence to go out and try to find someone. I sort of feel like all the women are taken...And that's why I'm trying to get rid of wanting love.

I mean, I got rejected even on the internet, and that's even worse for me, because that makes me think that the opposite gender sees me as some sort of disease walking through the world...

I understand you dont worry. But u cant be Asexual u are born like that like is homesexual. Asexuality isnt coz u decide to be asexual is just natural not feeling emotions for sex.

Is your choice u arent disease u are human being, not every woman is taken. First try work on your confidence and later let love come to you. I was telling u before sometimes we give up and later we wonder how love was coming to us all of sudden.
 

Diend

Well-known member
Does anyone know how I can grab control of my mind and just relax? I've been forcing thoughts and desires out of my mind, and I almost threw up last night

because I've been trying to think and feel nothing but happy thoughts...And although this I got the positive thoughts and feelings in my head, I just feeling sick from all the stress I'm getting from it...
::(:

Play with a yo-yo (works for me)
 

JamesSmith

Well-known member
Anxiety is something you can't just think yourself out of. You have to be able to teach your body to relax. When you aren't practicing relaxing, you always want to be busy with something. The worst thing you can do is just sit there and do nothing and think for a while.
 

Minty

Well-known member
Even asexual people need intimacy. Just not the sexual kind... You can't really eliminate that desire. It's best not to try.

Anyways, what are you doing right now? I agree with James. The worst thing you can do is nothing while letting your thoughts race.
 

A friend

Well-known member
I understand you dont worry. But u cant be Asexual u are born like that like is homesexual. Asexuality isnt coz u decide to be asexual is just natural not feeling emotions for sex.

Is your choice u arent disease u are human being, not every woman is taken. First try work on your confidence and later let love come to you. I was telling u before sometimes we give up and later we wonder how love was coming to us all of sudden.



I guess it's more healthy to give up trying to eliminate the need for love than getting depressed from it. Yesterday I got sick from that subject, but now I feel better, and that's probably from reading and going to sleep for 12 hours.
:)
 

Minty

Well-known member
I guess it's more healthy to give up trying to eliminate the need for love than getting depressed from it. Yesterday I got sick from that subject, but now I feel better, and that's probably from reading and going to sleep for 12 hours.
:)

See :) Find some healthy, positive distractions. Reading is a really good hobby to have. When I read, it takes me to another place and my problems don't exist.
 
I've always been told and read trying to control your thoughts in any fashion makes things worse. Just leave yourself alone and go about your day, your mind should quiet down.
This is easier said then done, but its the truth.
 
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