Look Okay One Minute, Not Okay The Next?

J.Christine.89

Well-known member
After reading through many of these threads, I have come to realize that I don't have SA nearly as badly as some other people on here. But that's okay, because I know what they're talking about and have dealt with it through much of high school.

I have an issue with thinking I look alright one minute and the next minute, I'll look in the mirror and think, "Ugh. I don't look that good." It flip flops like this all day long. I often feel that I look strange, that my eyes are too large. I often get mistaken for being older than I really am (which is 21, btw). It's odd. I tend to obsess over the little things that I don't like about my looks and feel that they are magnified to the world x10. Of course, I always talk myself down about that because I know that people aren't thinking the same things I think. It can definitely feel that way some times, though.

Does anyone else feel the same way? Do you get where I'm coming from?
 

tweetebird

Well-known member
You may want to google "body dysmorphic disorder" Don't be fooled by the name, it can apply, sometimes exclusively form some people (like me) to the face.
 

Rodney

Well-known member
Oh yeah. My mind is always ****ing with me. I'll look in the mirror and say "Hey, not bad" and then go and take a picture and think "WTF, my chin is so off-centred and my smile is so ugly!". I hate it. I spend way longer getting ready to leave the house than the majority of men and I still look like **** (or at least in my mind I do). Some times I won't leave the house because I can't find clothes that fit or I just feel ugly. It really holds me back...
 

coyote

Well-known member
After reading through many of these threads, I have come to realize that I don't have SA nearly as badly as some other people on here. But that's okay, because I know what they're talking about and have dealt with it through much of high school.

I have an issue with thinking I look alright one minute and the next minute, I'll look in the mirror and think, "Ugh. I don't look that good." It flip flops like this all day long. I often feel that I look strange, that my eyes are too large. I often get mistaken for being older than I really am (which is 21, btw). It's odd. I tend to obsess over the little things that I don't like about my looks and feel that they are magnified to the world x10. Of course, I always talk myself down about that because I know that people aren't thinking the same things I think. It can definitely feel that way some times, though.

Does anyone else feel the same way? Do you get where I'm coming from?

I get where you're coming from - I feel they same way, do the same things.
 

Jake123

Banned
Ugh, I know how that feels. Sometimes I feel like I look okay, then I look in the mirror and want to cry. Or worse, look in two mirrors to see what I really look like (since a mirror is reversed) and nearly vomit.
 

Feathers

Well-known member
I read in a cool book today that there are no 'ugly' people, just 'ugly' behavior - and I really liked that!! :)

Think about it. Everyone is attractive to someone, just like Prince Charles and Camilla-??

I can totally relate to what you write, including that my SA isn't so bad apparently, I still found a lot of great info here..

How I like myself depends on many things - how I feel in general (about Life, the Universe and Everything), my energy level, it's connected to weather, nutrition, exercise, what I do etc. If I'm excited about something, I usually like myself too. :) Or just shrug and look away..

My moods can go up and down, I call it being bipolar-ish, look up BDD too, yeah, there are some threads about it in OCD sub-forum.
There are some good books about BDD on Amazon too..

What you describe is also 'focusing on the negative' and CBT books might be helpful too..

You can totally retrain your brain and focus on the positive, your other qualities as a person, or at on least neutral stuff.. PINEAPPLES! (for example :D) That's an experiment we're doing in another thread :D
 

J.Christine.89

Well-known member
You may want to google "body dysmorphic disorder" Don't be fooled by the name, it can apply, sometimes exclusively form some people (like me) to the face.

Thats exactly right. Body Dysmorphic Disorder sounds like it might make sense.


I looked up this disorder and it does seem to fit the bill... how the heck do you overcome something like this? Therapy? I've been this way forever! I didn't even know it was a disorder?? Yikes
 

tweetebird

Well-known member
I have a mild form of it, so this may help you if it's also just mild. Most days I am fine, and my BDD seems to get triggered during times of high anxiety. Just learning that it is this weird disorder that actually distorts the image I see of myself has been very helpful for me. Now I can recognize it when it starts happening. I remind myself that it is just the BDD, and otherwise, I look fine. I learn to manage it by not letting myself focus on it (when it is affecting me). I won't stand in front of the mirror in horror, focusing on these distortions anymore. I view it as a lie, a trick, and I won't fall for it anymore :) If I have to leave the house during an episode, I only let myself check the mirror quickly, and from a good distance away.

Again, I realize that it is only mild for me, so please don't let this discourage you if these simple steps don't help you. I am sure there are resources on the internet on how to manage this disorder.
 
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