I don't undestand flirting

jryden

jryden

Well-known member
Its so cheesy and stupid and gahh there's so much I want to say. I can't even think of the words but srsly.

I just saw this match.com commercial for events they set up like cooking classes to meet people. The flirting UGHH. I can't do that. It seems so fake to me and I'm not saying it is (Ok maybe it is) but I can't pull it off.
 
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Silatuyok

Well-known member
I hate flirting too. Always have. Being real is all it should take to attract the right type of person. :) I guess I'm a no-nonsense kinda girl.
 
Lea

Lea

Banned
bcsr said:
How do you get better at anything in life? Practice. :)
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I don´t agree with it. Let everybody be themselves. If it´s against someone´s nature, so be it. We shouldn´t make of ourselves what we are not.
 
Section_31

Section_31

Well-known member
I think you can still flirt without being fake....isnt it more like maintaining eye contact and carrying on conversation?. just being interested in what the other person is saying? I tend to focus more on the small physical subtle hints that shes interested vs what im actually saying, LOL. But that said DO pay attention!

As a guy there are several ways to tell if shes interested....unfortunately im not able to say so for women but im sure theres a guide out there.
 
razzle dazzle rose

razzle dazzle rose

Well-known member
There are many ways to flirt. It doesn't have to be cheesy or super fake. Do what you feel comfortable with. Smiling is friendly, and it can be a form of flirting. Making eye contact and then a smile. Boom, done. It is a start.
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
i'm not sure i understand how it's fake

flirting is just the opposite of fake

you're letting the other person know that you're interested in them

it's just in a relaxed, casual, maybe playful way in order to take the pressure off

it's like testing the water - dipping your toes in and seeing whether it's safe before you take the plunge
 
Lea

Lea

Banned
bcsr said:
Isn't that part of why people are here? To overcome social anxiety? Making ourselves what we are not... happy, confident, social.
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Not me. I am not even here to "overcome social anxiety", firstly, this is best done in real life and not internet or this site, secondly, in real life I´ve done my best about this and know more than well one thing, I will always be this way no matter what I do. I don´t even care to be "happy, confident or social". I don´t want to be an pretentious a*hole. I have asperger syndrome just like most people here (not you as I´m guessing according to your posts I saw here and there) and this is not something that just goes away.
 
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GhastlyCC

Well-known member
coyote said:
i'm not sure i understand how it's fake

flirting is just the opposite of fake

you're letting the other person know that you're interested in them

it's just in a relaxed, casual, maybe playful way in order to take the pressure off

it's like testing the water - dipping your toes in and seeing whether it's safe before you take the plunge
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This!
Well said.
 
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Silatuyok

Well-known member
razzle dazzle rose said:
There are many ways to flirt. It doesn't have to be cheesy or super fake. Do what you feel comfortable with. Smiling is friendly, and it can be a form of flirting. Making eye contact and then a smile. Boom, done. It is a start.
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This is true. There are forms of flirting that I do find acceptable and effective to engage in. Gentle teasing is a good one. Smiling is another. But for me it has to be very subtle, or I immediately shut myself off.
It's amazing that I've ever even been in a relationship, lol. I'm a tough nut to crack.
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
Absolutely_Sweet_Marie said:
This is true. There are forms of flirting that I do find acceptable and effective to engage in. Gentle teasing is a good one. Smiling is another. But for me it has to be very subtle, or I immediately shut myself off.
It's amazing that I've ever even been in a relationship, lol. I'm a tough nut to crack.
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that's why i always carry a nutcracker
 
TailsAlone

TailsAlone

Well-known member
I don't really understand it either. The sad thing is I used to be good at it, or at least capable of it...when I was like ten. xD Then the fear and constant rejection got to me.
 
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