How Did You Feel After Your First Therapy Session?

Hey guys. I know I've been gone for a while, initially left because my life got busy, I was in a really good place, and figured it was time to move on and focus on other things. Things are still really well in my life, but recently I've been struggling with my depression and anxiety again.

I finally decided to take the big step into going to therapy, since it's free here at college. I had my first appointment this morning. I met with a woman who I really liked. She was nice, had a quiet voice, I didn't feel intimidated by her hardly at all. I didn't have too much of a problem opening up to her, and she said she was surprised I talked about as much as I did since I scored rather high on her diagnostic sheet for social anxiety.

Since this morning's appointment I've felt so weird. I just have this raw feeling, and I've felt self-conscious and exposed all day. I can't stop thinking about what we talked about and what else I could've said, how the conversations could've went, etc. I did cry during the appointment. Actually I pretty much bawled, and that really threw me off guard because I wasn't expecting it. We just got to talking about things that I've kept withdrawn for a long time and it just hit me. The dam broke and I couldn't stop crying for a little while. :sad: I feel so stupid for crying. She reassured me that it wasn't stupid and it was okay, but I still feel so dumb.

I'm just looking for some reassurance. How did you feel after your first therapy appointment? Is it normal to feel this way?

I think it's completely normal cry when you let out stuff that you've been keeping hidden because you hide it from yourself as well as others, to some extent, and there is a lot of emotion that hides with it. They always have a box of tissues at hand, so they expect it! It's healthy to cry and it sounds like you're comfortable with this therapist so go for it!

Yea I cried. I think a lot of people may because usually people hold their fears and SA inside for so long before they get to the point of thinking 'yes I do need help, I don't want to feel like this forever'.
So when they do finally talk in confidence, it's like a release of built up emotion.

I think therapy is great, it's helped me. My advice is to move forward with your therapist.
I know some people go to them to babble on, just wallow in depressive thoughts etc.
Have a plan, know and realize key points you are working on. They are there to work WITH you, not FOR you. (I'm sure you already know this)

Good luck with it!

Ah, okay. That's good to know, thanks. All day yesterday I was pretty fragile and weepy. I even cried when I told the boyfriend. He's supportive, even though he doesn't understand. He at least doesn't think I'm crazy, so that's good. I'm feeling a lot better today about everything. A good night's sleep helped.

I really like this therapist too, but yesterday she told me she's an intern and her internship ends in June. So I probably won't see her next semester. :/ Sucks because I felt pretty comfortable with her. She wants to keep seeing me until June, I have a follow-up next Monday. She suggested maybe eventually working with group therapy, but there's no plan yet until she talks to the psychologist she has to refer to. Said she'd probably have something by our next appointment.

Hey Phoenixx :greeting:

I definitely felt exposed.I remember I felt angry with myself. I wasn't sure how to be yknow. It was uncomfortable for me.

However it helped me. I don't really know how it all works but it did help me. I was able to move on with my life.

I think its a good thing to do.

It's hard not to cry to be honest.

I have cried during some of my therapy sessions. It happens when things get really real for me. When I have broke through the crap and found the moment. The truth.

kilojoule said:

Hey Phoenixx :greeting:

I definitely felt exposed.I remember I felt angry with myself. I wasn't sure how to be yknow. It was uncomfortable for me.

However it helped me. I don't really know how it all works but it did help me. I was able to move on with my life.

I think its a good thing to do.

Click to expand...

^ That's good to hear, it helped you. I'm guessing you're done with therapy? How did therapy work for you? What were some exercises you did? I just want to get a little bit of a picture of what else I could be expecting.


Thanks for the reassurance guys. I'm glad to see I'm not the only one.

Phoenixx said:

^ That's good to hear, it helped you. I'm guessing you're done with therapy? How did therapy work for you? What were some exercises you did? I just want to get a little bit of a picture of what else I could be expecting.


Thanks for the reassurance guys. I'm glad to see I'm not the only one.

Click to expand...

Yea I'm finished therapy a couple years now. I did CBT and attended every week for over a year and I particpated in group therapy a few times too. The main outcome is that I see patterns and do things differently to before. I see the people around me differently and I give people a lot less power over me. Its a gradual process

kilojoule said:

Yea I'm finished therapy a couple years now. I did CBT and attended every week for over a year and I particpated in group therapy a few times too. The main outcome is that I see patterns and do things differently to before. I see the people around me differently and I give people a lot less power over me. Its a gradual process

Click to expand...

^ My therapist mentioned patterns already, made note of some of the things I do regarding anxiety. I'm sure that is something we'll be working on, recognizing more and more patterns and how to overcome them. Even just bringing that up last time already made me slightly more aware of what I do. Well, rather recognizing more that I do certain things, not so much controlling them. That itself is another obstacle to tackle that will probably take a long time.

Really glad to hear therapy worked so well for you. I hope it works really well for me too.

i could relate with you feeling exposed at first. it's normal considering how the therapist is a stranger. i think my first, i cried as well, but i was glad he kept a straight face as it prevents me from feeling like a victim.

Phoenixx said:

^ My therapist mentioned patterns already, made note of some of the things I do regarding anxiety. I'm sure that is something we'll be working on, recognizing more and more patterns and how to overcome them. Even just bringing that up last time already made me slightly more aware of what I do. Well, rather recognizing more that I do certain things, not so much controlling them. That itself is another obstacle to tackle that will probably take a long time.

Really glad to hear therapy worked so well for you. I hope it works really well for me too.

Click to expand...

That sounds really positive. And yknow I found even the act of going to therapy really empowering.

Off topic but I read in another thread you have exams at the moment and that's tough I might just reply to it here if its ok. I was so ready to have complete breakdown last year during exams. I went to my Dr midway I thought I was going crazy- the sleeplessness and lack of appetite I was so on edge, so jumpy, so emotional, slightly paranoid and completely disorientated. She told me to hang in there and realize the sudden extreme anxiety was probably related to exams she was right. It took me a couple months to feel normal but I did. Finals are the worst marathon ever. I hope you're feeling better soon phoenixx I hope you have some nice camomile tea and some relaxing candles or whatever helps to help you get through it. You can do it.

kilojoule said:

That sounds really positive. And yknow I found even the act of going to therapy really empowering.

Off topic but I read in another thread you have exams at the moment and that's tough I might just reply to it here if its ok. I was so ready to have complete breakdown last year during exams. I went to my Dr midway I thought I was going crazy- the sleeplessness and lack of appetite I was so on edge, so jumpy, so emotional, slightly paranoid and completely disorientated. She told me to hang in there and realize the sudden extreme anxiety was probably related to exams she was right. It took me a couple months to feel normal but I did. Finals are the worst marathon ever. I hope you're feeling better soon phoenixx I hope you have some nice camomile tea and some relaxing candles or whatever helps to help you get through it. You can do it.

Click to expand...

^ Thanks, kilojoule. I just finished exams on Wednesday, and finished up a couple Sociology papers yesterday too. *phew* My last exam for chemistry was the one looming on my mind for a while, stressing me out the most. So much information I had to study, I worked like a dog and pretty much did a total of nearly 24 hours studying (obviously not at once) because half of the information my professor covered in class just did not click. I ended up having to go back, reread the text, look over my notes, and teach myself. It added to my workload, stressed me out more, but it helped I guess. That particular final ended up being 12 pages long with nearly 40 problems, give or take a few. I think I did okay on it.

I'm so relieved now, having everything done. I really should be prepping a bit more for my course that starts on Monday, but I really just want to breathe. This semester was insanely busy for me. It was very stressful, and I probably brought some of it on myself procrastinating some weeks throughout. I haven't had a semester that busy in a while, but I'm hoping the work paid off. I know I'm not defined by my GPA, but dang it I like having a really good GPA, and I will work my butt off for it if I have to -- blood, sweat, and tears included. Because I'm a perfectionist and always have been. That's probably not healthy, but... yeah.

Anyway today I plan on enjoying myself by working on a project I've been at off and on for the past year or so. I'd also like to clean my computer too while I'm at it and reorganize everything.

Phoenixx said:

I'm just looking for some reassurance. How did you feel after your first therapy appointment? Is it normal to feel this way?

Click to expand...

There was a box of paper tissue right next to my armchair so I guess it's pretty normal for people to cry during therapy. I didn't feel like crying but it was a bit exhausting.
I felt very optimistic at first but became more and more skeptical about therapy as time went by.