Good luck with talking to cute-gym-guy Sarah! :thumbup:
Wouldn't it be freaky if you both end up having a relationship, which could be attributed to finally beginning, from your fortune cookie, lol. ::
Hahaha Thanks, Blue! I'm so nervous!
How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Hahaha Thanks, Blue! I'm so nervous!
Good luck :thumbup: hope it goes well, you deserve someone to treat you well
Thanks. Pug! We'll see how it goes!
F0AM
Well-known member
Good luck Sarah!!
Remember that Pug, Blue and i will be watching from the distance and giving you our support!!
Good luck Sarah!!
Remember that Pug, Blue and i will be watching from the distance and giving you our support!!
Thanks, F0AM! I'm going to laugh if he's not even working today haha.
Phoenixx
Well-known member
I always find myself back here when I'm feeling troubled or down. My tumblr used to be my go-to for venting, but I abandoned it long ago because the porn just wouldn't stop following me on that site (for some unknown reason), no matter how many times I reported it.
Anywho....
I wish my mother would go to therapy. I wish my parents would just divorce already. I'm so sick and tired of having to be the person my mother vents to because my brother is too caught up in his own ego to even give two shits. I'm tired of being a broken record and telling her what she should be doing, only to be completely ignored and for her to continue complaining about things she can change -- even if they are difficult. I'm tired of seeing my mother depressed. I'm tired of my father emotionally abusing her. I'm tired of my dysfunctional family. I'm tired of STILL somehow being dragged into this supposedly never-ending cycle that has been going on for the last. 10+. years. And I don't even live there anymore! I'm just tired!
I don't really know what to do. I wish there was something I could do, but actually I don't think there is a single thing I can do besides vent about it and then go about my life.
My entire life has completely changed since I first started posting here 7 or so years ago. I am in a place that I NEVER in a million years thought I'd ever reach, yet here I am. I am damn proud of it... but somehow all the issues I dealt with back then still follow me. They still hover over my head and resurface every so often because of my family. I can't abandon them though, especially my mother. I can move 2+ hours away to preserve my sanity, work my *** off for the life I want and to ignore what I try to leave behind, but yet no way can I run from it all completely. Their issues makes all my bad feelings resurface and I hate that.
My husband doesn't understand. I don't think he ever will. I don't need him to, I just need him to be there for me when I need it the most. Sometimes he's oblivious to where my feelings come from, but I think he's starting to catch on.
Anywho....
I wish my mother would go to therapy. I wish my parents would just divorce already. I'm so sick and tired of having to be the person my mother vents to because my brother is too caught up in his own ego to even give two shits. I'm tired of being a broken record and telling her what she should be doing, only to be completely ignored and for her to continue complaining about things she can change -- even if they are difficult. I'm tired of seeing my mother depressed. I'm tired of my father emotionally abusing her. I'm tired of my dysfunctional family. I'm tired of STILL somehow being dragged into this supposedly never-ending cycle that has been going on for the last. 10+. years. And I don't even live there anymore! I'm just tired!
I don't really know what to do. I wish there was something I could do, but actually I don't think there is a single thing I can do besides vent about it and then go about my life.
My entire life has completely changed since I first started posting here 7 or so years ago. I am in a place that I NEVER in a million years thought I'd ever reach, yet here I am. I am damn proud of it... but somehow all the issues I dealt with back then still follow me. They still hover over my head and resurface every so often because of my family. I can't abandon them though, especially my mother. I can move 2+ hours away to preserve my sanity, work my *** off for the life I want and to ignore what I try to leave behind, but yet no way can I run from it all completely. Their issues makes all my bad feelings resurface and I hate that.
My husband doesn't understand. I don't think he ever will. I don't need him to, I just need him to be there for me when I need it the most. Sometimes he's oblivious to where my feelings come from, but I think he's starting to catch on.
Marc7
Well-known member
This is not positive but I been feeling like if I can't face the world without being anxious, feeling inferior, or thinking about events or situations that happened later in the day (which I do everyday) why am I here? Also why I'm here if I have a hard time making life decisions? I know this is my depressive symptoms speaking and I could go on but I don't want to say everything I'm feeling. Besides that I feel like most people stop talking to me online and it sucks because I don't have many friends :sad:. Maybe it is my social skills or I'm just boring idk :idontknow:.
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PugofCrydee
You want to know how I got these scars?
I completely hear what you're saying.And I get it. What you said is almost like it was me that wrote it.
I'll respond a bit more when I aren't at work (I'm on a break)
BlueDays
1
Are you happy about that, or are you dreading it?
Either way, I hope the first few days back, go well for you Kiwong. Good luck. :thumbup:
BlueDays
1
Hello Phoenixx :greeting:
That is really not fair that your mother keeps involving you in her marriage troubles, that you said have been going on for 10+ years!
If she is doing nothing to leave that kind of situation after all that time, then I would just explain to her that you are tired of hearing her complaining about the abuse for 10+ years. Tell her that if she won't leave him, then she can no longer weigh you down with her troubles, over and over again, anymore.
Your mother can't accuse you of not caring, because you have been listening to the same stuff for so many years now!
You say your brother is wrapped up in his own life, well why has your mother not required him to step up and give some support to her, like you have been? Why has she left him alone, and placed the whole burden on YOU?
Maybe you should suggest to her that she only vent to your brother from now on, and let him take a turn for the next 10 years.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Awww... that’s a relief ! raying:
You were right, Nathan. :thumbup:
Turns out I’ve got a throat infection. Though, the doctor was quite surprised that I didn’t sound worse cuz there’s still a fair bit of swelling above my collarbone. Not as bad as a few days ago though. But I’ve got some antibiotics to help clear the infection. So, I’ll see how it goes...
raying:My guess would be a swollen lymph node from some infection you're fighting.
But yeah, talking to a doctor is much safer than guessing. Especially if it's been there a while without going away.
You were right, Nathan. :thumbup:
Turns out I’ve got a throat infection. Though, the doctor was quite surprised that I didn’t sound worse cuz there’s still a fair bit of swelling above my collarbone. Not as bad as a few days ago though. But I’ve got some antibiotics to help clear the infection. So, I’ll see how it goes...
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
I'm glad to hear that Graeme, that it wasn't wose.
Same here. I was thinking the worst in first few days of the infection.
mg: But thankfully it was just my body trying to clear that throat infection by itself. It's start to go away now, though.
F0AM
Well-known member
Awww... that’s a relief !
You were right, Nathan. :thumbup:
Turns out I’ve got a throat infection. Though, the doctor was quite surprised that I didn’t sound worse cuz there’s still a fair bit of swelling above my collarbone. Not as bad as a few days ago though. But I’ve got some antibiotics to help clear the infection. So, I’ll see how it goes...
Very Happy to read this Graeme!
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BlueDays
1
If I did not have 2 family members that would be heavily impacted by my death, I would l be dying today.
I have no one in real life (no friends) to say this too, so I am typing it in here.
I'm done. I've had enough of this.
I am forced to continue as a tortured, shell of a human being, for their sake. I so badly want to die today, but I can't. It's not fair. :sad:
I have no one in real life (no friends) to say this too, so I am typing it in here.
I'm done. I've had enough of this.
I am forced to continue as a tortured, shell of a human being, for their sake. I so badly want to die today, but I can't. It's not fair. :sad:
PugofCrydee
You want to know how I got these scars?
I can relate Blue :sad: I also feel trapped by those around me. In my case its because I don't want to hurt those closest to me. Other than that I hate our society. I know there's good and bad in it, but if it wasn't for the pain I'd cause those closest to me I'd opt out today.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Getting that point where ah genuinely couldn’t give a f*ck anymore. :thumbdown: Bucking sick o’ my mother sayin’ “Oh, ma life’s no worth living ! You lot treat me like shite !” Next thing, she’s f…ckin’ havering tae me aboot how we get along. And how my Mum gets on better with me cuz she doesnae tolerate me talking to her the way my sisters do. Huh?! :idontknow: But then ah never tolerated that behaviour n’ attitude from her, either. So there ye go...
Oh, and every time ah give advice, I’m nagging and getting on at my Mum. Yet, I’m tell her what I’d do if I were being treated the way she is. But am seriously f…ckin’ done with the lotta o’ them. Ah cannae keep being the yin who’s always forced to act as the family psychiatrist every time there’s an argument. :sad:
Huh?! :idontknow: But then ah never tolerated that behaviour n’ attitude from her, either. So there ye go...Oh, and every time ah give advice, I’m nagging and getting on at my Mum. Yet, I’m tell her what I’d do if I were being treated the way she is. But am seriously f…ckin’ done with the lotta o’ them. Ah cannae keep being the yin who’s always forced to act as the family psychiatrist every time there’s an argument. :sad:
Kiwong
Well-known member
Having a stroke was an extravagant way of breaking the back of my anxiety, but it has made a change for the better I nearly lost everything, but have regained my sanity. And all the things I feared losing are coming back. It is so much like a rebirth.
The anxious me I sometimes saw as Boo Radley, and I have watched the ending of To Kill a Mockingbird several times.
Like Boo I have come out, and am reverting back to the me I was before anxiety and panic began to rule my life some 18 years ago
The anxious me I sometimes saw as Boo Radley, and I have watched the ending of To Kill a Mockingbird several times.
Like Boo I have come out, and am reverting back to the me I was before anxiety and panic began to rule my life some 18 years ago
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Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
On the positive side of things, I found out why my 3 year old niece likes me. It’s because, as my oldest sister pointed out the other day, I still treat her like she’s a kid. And I don’t shout or swear at her as her mother has a tendency to do. Apparently, my older sister hates that my niece will come up to my room after my sister yell at her. But then I don’t blame her...
She (my niece) also seems to do as she told when I ask her to do something or tell her not to. Well, most of the time anyway. She still temperamental, just like her mother. Though, after our wee verbal confrontation last year where I snapped and told her what I think of her, my older sister doesn’t really speak to me. Not that she ever did much before that.
Wish I had something to take my mind off my family drama? Booze is kinda outta the question financially at the moment. So music it is, I guess...
She (my niece) also seems to do as she told when I ask her to do something or tell her not to. Well, most of the time anyway. She still temperamental, just like her mother. Though, after our wee verbal confrontation last year where I snapped and told her what I think of her, my older sister doesn’t really speak to me. Not that she ever did much before that.
Wish I had something to take my mind off my family drama? Booze is kinda outta the question financially at the moment. So music it is, I guess...