How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Arguments. Constant f*ckin' arguments! This is all I hear on an almost daily. Cuz ye see my family are incapable o' gettin' long. The men in my family are arsehole - which includes me (guilt by association because gender). :kickingmyself: But the wimmin... Aww, cannae dae anything wrong. And very little right from my observations of asking them to do stuff for me. :idontknow:
Och! Y'know what? F**k the lotta o' them! Loud, obnoxious, smug, arrogant, lying, unreliable - at least they are, when I ask 'em to do anything - psycho-fannies. Should've put me up fur adoption and spare me tha f**kin' stress o' huvin to put with them. Cuz I'm no jokin', I'm on the verge o' snapping and doing summit I'll likely regret. Not to them, but myself. :sad: It's too much to bare... All this. It really is. :crying:
Och! Y'know what? F**k the lotta o' them! Loud, obnoxious, smug, arrogant, lying, unreliable - at least they are, when I ask 'em to do anything - psycho-fannies. Should've put me up fur adoption and spare me tha f**kin' stress o' huvin to put with them. Cuz I'm no jokin', I'm on the verge o' snapping and doing summit I'll likely regret. Not to them, but myself. :sad: It's too much to bare... All this. It really is. :crying:
Pacific_Loner
Pirate from the North Pole
I'm sorry to burst your bubble but missing persons are not anonymous, they are advertised everywhere
Alone in a big city full of busy people is anonymous. But it's not always peaceful. Sole human inhabitant of a gigantic forest sounds anonymous and peaceful, I think I would go with that if only there was such place left
AtTheGates
Banned
just set-up my web advisor account for this upcoming fall semester at the community college ill be going to. classes start on august 19th. tbh I was less scared when I started working as a correctional officer than I am now that ill be going to school/trying to get a degree.....I seriously need to study for the placement test or they're going to give me SO much remedial math to do. -_-
I haven't been in school since HIGH SCHOOL so I'm going to really have to settle into it...havent picked all my classes for first semester yet though but I'm really glad I'm going to be able to do them online because I dont like the idea of having to get up early and sit in a classroom full of 18 year olds ...
Idk what the sergeant will say when i tell her I'm resigning (for the time being) in august but I'm VERY relieved to be getting away from "prison life" . lol
I just really hope I dont flunk out of college or something : /
also, I looked at the schedule for orientation and I'm DEFINITELY going to skip that sh!t. i dont want to sit in some giant crowded room all day and all the info they'll be giving can be found online anyway......plus I dont want to see someone I knew from back in the day.
I haven't been in school since HIGH SCHOOL so I'm going to really have to settle into it...havent picked all my classes for first semester yet though but I'm really glad I'm going to be able to do them online because I dont like the idea of having to get up early and sit in a classroom full of 18 year olds ...
Idk what the sergeant will say when i tell her I'm resigning (for the time being) in august but I'm VERY relieved to be getting away from "prison life" . lol
I just really hope I dont flunk out of college or something : /
also, I looked at the schedule for orientation and I'm DEFINITELY going to skip that sh!t. i dont want to sit in some giant crowded room all day and all the info they'll be giving can be found online anyway......plus I dont want to see someone I knew from back in the day.
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theslowesthand
Banned
It seems i would rather be ENDLESSLY BORED & ALONE than have a woman in my life. Too many hurdles to overcome, too much change, too different lifestyles, etc, etc. Oh well, that's that then. :question: :idontknow:
And that's not even including the emotional aspects!
And that's not even including the emotional aspects!
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theslowesthand
Banned
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Megaten
Well-known member
It appears it can [emoji845]Apparently, this text advert (which is useful to nobody), can be disabled.
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theslowesthand
Banned
:thumbup:.
Kiwong
Well-known member
I'm sorry to burst your bubble but missing persons are not anonymous, they are advertised everywhere
True, but some missing people disappear and manage to start new lives elsewhere.
The world of missing person I envisage is slipping through the cracks of this reality where like souls can find peace on their own.
I was reported missing once by my father. Took a week and no one found me.
theslowesthand
Banned
As yet i haven't "accepted" that as a possibility, you know, deep down. Well i don't think i have anyway. Else wouldn't i be feeling really depressed about my life, & not just feeling hopeless & apathetic? :question: :idontknow:
AtTheGates
Banned
exhausted. SOME days I really do feel like a parent at work. The inmates in Dorm 2/A-pod were complaining SO much today after lunch because I wouldnt turn up the volume on their tv..I tried to explain to them why I couldn't ad of COURSE they wouldnt listen.
TV's in prison have to be on mute with closed captions on because if a few inmates are trying to watch a move or show and other inmates won't be quiet so they can hear the tv then a fight can break out. apparently its happened before .
oh well...im just glad that I'm not regularly assigned to dorms 3 and 4 anymore. thats where most of the fights are because those dorms are processing/intake units.
Dorms 1 and 2 are mostly for the inmates who are in for the long haul. which is great because the inmates in there have gotten a pretty good idea of what I will and will NOT tolerate (except for a few of them and whenever new ones move in from other dorms) .
when I was in dorms 3 and 4 id have to re-establish dominance EVERY time we had a new shipment of inmates arrive. they'd have to "get to know me", so to speak . lol . never had to mace anyone though ad I'm hoping that will hold out until august when I start school.
but this job has been GREAT as exposure therapy . being called names and made fun of EVERY work day kind of gives you a thicker skin over time . at this point, theres nothing anyone could possibly say that would hurt my feelings at all. I'm immune now. lol
tbh though, I feel bad for some of the officers there who are like 50 and never moved up...after i get a degree I MIGHT come back to corrections as a last resort but id be trying to become a sergeant as fast as possible...
either that or apply for a case manager/correctional counselor position .
TV's in prison have to be on mute with closed captions on because if a few inmates are trying to watch a move or show and other inmates won't be quiet so they can hear the tv then a fight can break out. apparently its happened before .
oh well...im just glad that I'm not regularly assigned to dorms 3 and 4 anymore. thats where most of the fights are because those dorms are processing/intake units.
Dorms 1 and 2 are mostly for the inmates who are in for the long haul. which is great because the inmates in there have gotten a pretty good idea of what I will and will NOT tolerate (except for a few of them and whenever new ones move in from other dorms) .
when I was in dorms 3 and 4 id have to re-establish dominance EVERY time we had a new shipment of inmates arrive. they'd have to "get to know me", so to speak . lol . never had to mace anyone though ad I'm hoping that will hold out until august when I start school.
but this job has been GREAT as exposure therapy . being called names and made fun of EVERY work day kind of gives you a thicker skin over time . at this point, theres nothing anyone could possibly say that would hurt my feelings at all. I'm immune now. lol
tbh though, I feel bad for some of the officers there who are like 50 and never moved up...after i get a degree I MIGHT come back to corrections as a last resort but id be trying to become a sergeant as fast as possible...
either that or apply for a case manager/correctional counselor position .
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FountainandFairfax
in a VAN down by the RIVER
Nervous.
I do the grocery shopping for my great aunt (she's 94) and tomorrow she wants me to go somewhere I've never been before. I happen to know that someone I went to school with used to work at this place and I really don't want to bump into them.
I just dread the whole "What have you been up to?" thing. Besides, my sleeping is crap again and I know my fat as$ is gonna look like deep-fried death.
Oh well, bring it.
I do the grocery shopping for my great aunt (she's 94) and tomorrow she wants me to go somewhere I've never been before. I happen to know that someone I went to school with used to work at this place and I really don't want to bump into them.
I just dread the whole "What have you been up to?" thing. Besides, my sleeping is crap again and I know my fat as$ is gonna look like deep-fried death.
Oh well, bring it.
BlueDays
1
^ Maybe they don't work there anymore? :idontknow:
But I know the "not knowing" makes the anxiety worse. :sad:
I can't go into the cheapest Fruit & Vegetables store in my town because there might be someone working there who I used to work with too. My anxiety is making me have to pay more money for my fresh produce.
h:I love this "deep-fried death" :bigsmile: I have never heard that one before!
What has upset your sleeping?
defiance
Well-known member
I just overheard my mom talking to someone about her dream of owning a house and how she was really counting on me getting a good job to help get the loan and to make the payments. This right here fu*king killed me. I can't believe I have crushed her dreams of owning a home. Yet another example of someone counting on me to do something and I fall short once again. I can't believe how miserable I am making this woman. I am so sorry mom I am so FU*KING SORRY:crying:. I know you don't really blame me but I do blame myself. Fu*k my existence man:crying:
GraybeardGhost
Well-known member
I want this rotten life to be over.
defiance
Well-known member
This is how I feel about my life as well. The sooner it comes to an end the better it will be for everyone.
BlueDays
1
The place you need to lay the blame on is the selfish society that we now live in that requires two wages to be able to pay of a mortgage.
After WWII through to the late 1970's, a man -- with just his weekly wage -- could support his wife, 4 kids, own a car AND pay off a mortgage!!
A grown woman should not have to rely on her son to help her own her own her own home. The fault of that situation lies with the leaders of the world.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Hard to put into words, really. I mean, how exactly are ye supposed to feel when ye can't really trust yer ain family? They constantly lie and disappoint you whenever they promise you something. Yet, you're never allowed to let them down, otherwise, yer selfish _ _ _ _ (insert expletive).
D'ye know what it's like to be part of a family utterly incapable of just getting along, huh? Always arguing, rarely happy. And I'm the one stuck in the middle of it. Too afraid to speak or utter an opinion for fear that this clan of deranged Caledonian minge monkeys will suddenly direct all their bitterness, hate and angry towards me, as they huv a habit of doing. Because if there's any feminists hate more than men, it's a person who doesn't agree with them or praise them constantly. At least in my experience. :idontknow:
As if that was bad enough, I have listen to my Mum whinging about her declining physical health on a daily basis. Because, apparently, caring for her is my responsibility. Me - the disabled child. Nevermind if I struggle caring for myself. Or that I rarely give myself a moment to relax from the second I wake up in the morning. Oh, and better refrain from point out the obvious link between my mother health issues and her being overweight. Cuz that's lotta BS, innit? :kickingmyself: :sad:
Why am I never allowed to put my own well-being first? I'm always made to feel guilty whenever I do.
D'ye know what it's like to be part of a family utterly incapable of just getting along, huh? Always arguing, rarely happy. And I'm the one stuck in the middle of it. Too afraid to speak or utter an opinion for fear that this clan of deranged Caledonian minge monkeys will suddenly direct all their bitterness, hate and angry towards me, as they huv a habit of doing. Because if there's any feminists hate more than men, it's a person who doesn't agree with them or praise them constantly. At least in my experience. :idontknow:
As if that was bad enough, I have listen to my Mum whinging about her declining physical health on a daily basis. Because, apparently, caring for her is my responsibility. Me - the disabled child. Nevermind if I struggle caring for myself. Or that I rarely give myself a moment to relax from the second I wake up in the morning. Oh, and better refrain from point out the obvious link between my mother health issues and her being overweight. Cuz that's lotta BS, innit? :kickingmyself: :sad:
Why am I never allowed to put my own well-being first? I'm always made to feel guilty whenever I do.
AtTheGates
Banned
Jesus christ...my mom invited over this girl she works with thats my age and for some reason she's actually spending the night ...fvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvck! I haven't gotten home yet but am about to head home.
this is going to be completly awkward ....some girl I dont even know who is MY age and is now spending that night at the place I live.
and my brother is out of town so I can't crash at HIS place....I have no where else to go.
w..........t...........f
this is going to be completly awkward ....some girl I dont even know who is MY age and is now spending that night at the place I live.
and my brother is out of town so I can't crash at HIS place....I have no where else to go.
w..........t...........f
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