He made me cry

Peachy

New member
In gym (I'm in 10th grade) I'm always by myself which doesn't bother me because I always make a fool out of myself when I'm around people. But the teacher has a big problem with it. The 1st thing he said to me on the 1st day of school was: "Are you okay? You look sad or angry. Smile for me." I just nod my head "no." I can't help it, but my ugly face isn't built to look happy. :( So now it's the 3rd week and yesterday he came up to me durning the last 20 min. (I was standing alone infront of the door leading to the girls locker room) Everybody was playing basket ball, I was just praying the ball wouldn't hit me so I wouldn't have to kick back. Coach G approached. He said "Are you just really really shy?" (Hate that question.) I just shrugged. "Do you want me to stand here and ask you 50 questions?" I shrugged again. Then he goes on asking me questions like: What grade are you in? When's your birthday? Are you taking Drivers Ed? Are you in any sports? Do you live with both your parents? Are your shoes red? Blah blah blah! I just stared at the floor (eye contact is impossible) It was one of the most uncomfortable situations I've ever been in. Then I start getting teary eyed. I tried to hold back my crying. I don't understand why I started to cry, I wasn't even sad. I didn't want anybody to notice so I went into the girls locker room and locked myself in the bathrooom. (That's also where I spend my lunch) I stayed there till my blood shot eyes faded a bit. --- I don't understand why I cry! It happens a lot, especially when social situations become too much for me. I don't know what to do, it so embarrasing and awkward. :oops:
 

paul

Well-known member
Peachy, I can relate with gym class - some of the most anxiety there is.

Do you think that maybe when the social situation gets too much, you subconsciously have that extreme wish that you could be un-socially anxious, and that makes you cry? Or maybe you feel alone? I've never known anxiety to make you cry - maybe throw up or collapse - but crying is usually a more angry or sad thing, in my case at least.

Don't be so hard on yourself - it'll make this disorder much harder to get through - of course when you're in a bad mood you're naturally going to be negative. I know how doing this is such a difficult change and it's like going against your beliefs but the first step to getting over this is to have at least a semi-positive attitude that you will be able to.

Your gym teacher obviously doesn't understand social anxiety. He's not necessarily a bad person, just he seems quite clueless about this horrible disorder.

Welcome to SPW -- we know how you feel here -- and I hope you become a regular poster (it really has helped me). Good luck with getting over this disorder! We're all here to help.
 
It sucks that your gym teacher has no idea how to handle that kind of situation.

When I speak up in class and stuff, for a couple of seconds afterwards my eyes feel funny like I want to cry, but I don't feel sad or upset or anything. I think maybe it's just an automatic reaction your body has, and because your tutor didn't back off you ended up crying. Like a way to handle stress.

I used to always spend my lunch in the library on my own :( depressing innit, but things can get better, it did for me.

Stay strong

Naomi x
 
I'm in grade 10 and the first days in school were awful so just letting you know you are not alone. Also, I just switched school and started going to this new highschool. Because I wanted to have a clean slate so I can start over and hopefully start talking to people... That move was unexpectedly successful :D I am now able to ask people questions, be friendly etc. I think it's because people who know us avoid us because we usually give people the idea that we don't like to socialize but strangers don't have that knowledge. so switching school definitely helps building confidence in your people skills. Try it.

I don't have gym till the next semester. It's one of the things I hate 'cause I'm not a sports person.

I think SA disorder _does_ have something to do with crying. I think maybe as a escape from a tremendous amount of stress caused by SA e.g. if I am questioned by a gym teacher like that and obviously don't want to be treated that way but can't express my feeling I'd probably resort to crying.

With lunch, like you guys, I find it the one of the hardest part of the day.
I always spend my lunch in the library on my own 2. Sometimes doing random stuff on the computers, sometimes homework..

The first days of school was awful but I survived them and I hope you will too. :D
 

Chilling__Echo

Well-known member
i hate it for you sweetie. high school sucks ass, i'll be the first to tell ya. but i'm sure you already know. have you ever tried relaxation techniques? it may seem impossible now i know it, but with alot of work and time and patience things will get better. you just have to tell yourself that not everyone is out there to get you. they're not paying attention to you and i'm sure the teacher was trying to put you at ease, he may come off as an asshole but with questions like that, i wish i'd had the same one! he knows you're shy, just not to what extent.

just learn to breathe! take three deeps breaths and let them out slowly when you feel anxious, things will get better i promise. i used to dread simply walking into class. now i'm capable of doing presentations in my college classes. it is poossible to get through this! just take it one day at a time and learn to relax, have confidense in yourself. force yourself to be comfortable. take care and we're all here for you. <hugs>
 

ColdAsIce

Well-known member
Hey Peachy,

I sympathize with you, its been awhile since I left school, almost 7 years to be exact however I have many memories like the one you experienced. I use to just grin and bare it or if the teacher kept on I'd tell my mum and she'd ring the school and give them an earful.. ha ha

Maybe you could tell someone that it makes you feel uncomfortable to be challenged in this way?....

Stay strong and keep your head up...thankfully school time flys- by so don't let it get you down its not worth it.... 8)
 

Fighter86

Well-known member
I cry too when social situations are seemingly impossible. I cried when I went for school orientation & people seem to not want to talk to me :cry: At these times, I cry coz I feel depressed, sad, unwanted. Maybe u have such feelings but are not aware?

I HATED gym too(but in my city, they call it physical education lesson), esp. when we play games. I feel really stupid when I have to call for someone to pass me the ball but they don't. Hated it when the coach asked me silly questions- basically, they think I have an attitude problem, which I don't. Wat I have is SA which is why I don't take part actively in games, nor volunteer myself during gym class...my best advice: Juz ignore these ignorant people :wink:
 

Boundless

Well-known member
Your coach sounds harsh,i would have words with some 1 higher up and complain about his attitude,things like what he did can leave emotional scars for a long time :(
 

Fighter86

Well-known member
Boundless said:
things like what he did can leave emotional scars for a long time :(

I totally agree. I still remember till today this female coach who bullied me when I was in primary school(I'm 19 now). I hated her! The last I heard, she has been promoted to be some department of head & married this really wealthy man! Didn't know wat that man saw in a woman who bullies helpless kids. Also can't see why the school would want to promote her :roll:
 

Bexi

Well-known member
What is with PE teachers? They seem to be control freaks who make you go running in freezing weather with a flimsy top on, or run til u sweat in the heat aggggggg :evil: bullies As for peach, this guy sounds like he's on some sick power trip, to make you feel bad, what a wanker xxx
 

veryshy

Well-known member
It sounds to me like he genuinely was trying to help. He just didnt know how to do it well. There was a point when I was just like you, anyone talking about m eor making me the spotlight of attention in any way made me start to sweat and get irratible. School was horrible, I dropped out of regular school in 8th grade and out of school altogether at 9th.

In PE I would sit there, I didnt participate at all.
 

Chilling__Echo

Well-known member
yeah, that's what i'm saying, he sounds alot nicer than the one i had and seemed to be trying to make he/she feel better by making small talk, i'm sure he just didn't understand
 

blue

Well-known member
why is it always p.e teachers?! mine was just as bad , a few years ago now but it sticks with me, dont let it get to you, it really doesnt matter, im a super emotional person too and have always felt like crying in really stressful situations, just try to hold the tears back, concentrate on anything else other than what you are feeling inside and take deep breaths it really does help! :wink:
 

blue

Well-known member
why is it always p.e teachers?! mine was just as bad , a few years ago now but it sticks with me, dont let it get to you, it really doesnt matter, im a super emotional person too and have always felt like crying in really stressful situations, just try to hold the tears back, concentrate on anything else other than what you are feeling inside and take deep breaths it really does help! :wink:
 
I'm in the eleventh grade...It" so good u can cry.. seriously.. I wish I could.. I just feel so bad, tears are a blessing, no matter how stupid it sounds :D
 
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