Fear of Intimacy?

I've never dated before. It wouldn't seem odd if I told you I was a little girl ,but I'm turning 18 in 1 1/2 weeks and I've never dated, never kissed, and never been in love.

Its kind of weird because I feel real intelligent when it comes to school work ,but relationship wise, I feel really slow. Many guys find me attractive, I just don't feel what they see. I don't know if the issue is: me seeing myself as less of a person or fear of intimacy. I don't know, I wish I was a more outgoing person but I'm not.

I can relate. I'm turning 18 soon and would love to have a boyfriend but my anxiety gets in the way! :: I've had guys that I know are interested in me but I'm always to nervous to initiate anything. It's really nice knowing I'm not alone in this!

I'm a guy, 18 (almost 19) and I've never kissed a girl. Your not the first and you won't be the last. Don't worry about it.

Thanks for replying. Its good to know I'm not that one person in the world.

Yeah, I know what you mean. I fear my inadequacy, and his own. I'll be 18 on Mother's day. >.<

"It's not you, it's me."

I didn't have a real boyfriend until I was 18. I went on my first date when I was 19.

21 years old.

Same case here. Used to not be able to even approach a girl, but a girl just came into my life who's always there for me. Even when i quiet down and become "out of it" - she manages to pull me back in... it's amazing. Don't know how I became so lucky to find her, even if it's just a friendship - having a girl to that capacity, it's new.

But, basically, what I'm finding out is - keep with it, try to keep yourself in that area and good things will happen. Used to find that when I liked a girl and saw she liked me, I'd hide myself away really fast. Here, I'm just finally throwing myself in the seat next to her and she helps give me confidence every day. If she hadn't helped me along when I went quiet, I wouldn't have gradually got better and still getting better - but, every day now that confidence builds me up higher and higher and allows me to take more risks than ever before.

Best advice: try to put yourself in a situation where you know you'll meet someone in relationship or friendship capacity where intimacy is needed with someone of the opposite sex and hopefully you'll find someone nice who will help ease you along.

17..none of it and I very fear intimacy..

I didn't have a boyfriend until I was eighteen. Well, two days before my 18th birthday. Everyone goes at their own pace--don't rush into a relationship just because you feel like to be "normal" you have to.

You'll find someone eventually

I guess i'm the number one in the rank, cause i'm nearly 30 and i never kisser ether!
Not really fear of intimacy, just can't get to that point and it's not fear of girls nether cause i have iussues with men too (i haven't got friends)

oh,you're not alone,I'm 18 and will be 19 in summer,never kissed or dated a girl.
thinking about that girl will find me attractive kinda freaks me out,tbh,maybe because I've never met any girl that's interested in me,lol.

I'm also almost 30 and have never been in a relationship. I guess I do have intimacy issues. People, save yourselves from this while you're still young. Don't end up like me. I regret my actions immensely.

rayray said:

maybe because I've never met any girl that's interested in me,lol.

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Have you ever met a girl and talked to her for extended periods of time? Like at least half an hour. How many girls do you meet and talk to regularly? Is there a chance for a girl to actually get to know and like you?