dzerklis
Well-known member
hey all,
something very extreme happened to me yesterday i want to share. there is this girl i had been emailing with for a while, we met in a forum related to medicine, and she has low selfesteem and shyness, but not near as bad as mines. couple of days ago i told her i found a web page created by people whose parents were alcoholics, they organize meetings weekly, and that girl told shed like to go there as her parents were alcoholics, we agreed to go there together.
i had never been to any support group before. i expected there will be at least 20-30 people there, sitting in a circle, but actually there were only 4 people, without us two. they all were more or less talkative, none of them had SP, so i felt i didnt fit there but it was ok overall, i had to speak of course, which is NEVER easy for me, but o well i did it. the meeting seemed more like a meeting of people who have middleage crisis, but we with that girl will go there next week as well..
that girl, she was so nice to me, so supportive, she understands all my probs although shes very very talkative and didnt seem shy to me, at all. when i drove her home i thought omg what should i do, what WILL i do, i was soo tense and nervous, my hands were freezing, but when we stopped by her home she took my hand in her hand and said jesus your arm is cold (like i didnt kno lol), and we hugged. when i went home i felt so guilty all the time coz i couldnt be as nice to her as she was to me. i couldnt sleep at night. i decided to phone her (again, its NEVER easy and takes LOTS of guts). so when the morning came i though fck it and phoned and said regular things like what a nice weather was and said i wanted to hear her voice, first i couldnt get it out so there was an uncomfotable silence for a couple of secs, when i said it my voice was so shaky. after that i changed the 'subject' very fast. i dont knoe what will happened further.. its the lack of experience that makes me so veryvery nervous and scared..
i wanted to share it coz i thought maybe this could inspire those of u who have severe SP, like i do, and have never 'been' with girls for more than a few secs..
something very extreme happened to me yesterday i want to share. there is this girl i had been emailing with for a while, we met in a forum related to medicine, and she has low selfesteem and shyness, but not near as bad as mines. couple of days ago i told her i found a web page created by people whose parents were alcoholics, they organize meetings weekly, and that girl told shed like to go there as her parents were alcoholics, we agreed to go there together.
i had never been to any support group before. i expected there will be at least 20-30 people there, sitting in a circle, but actually there were only 4 people, without us two. they all were more or less talkative, none of them had SP, so i felt i didnt fit there but it was ok overall, i had to speak of course, which is NEVER easy for me, but o well i did it. the meeting seemed more like a meeting of people who have middleage crisis, but we with that girl will go there next week as well..
that girl, she was so nice to me, so supportive, she understands all my probs although shes very very talkative and didnt seem shy to me, at all. when i drove her home i thought omg what should i do, what WILL i do, i was soo tense and nervous, my hands were freezing, but when we stopped by her home she took my hand in her hand and said jesus your arm is cold (like i didnt kno lol), and we hugged. when i went home i felt so guilty all the time coz i couldnt be as nice to her as she was to me. i couldnt sleep at night. i decided to phone her (again, its NEVER easy and takes LOTS of guts). so when the morning came i though fck it and phoned and said regular things like what a nice weather was and said i wanted to hear her voice, first i couldnt get it out so there was an uncomfotable silence for a couple of secs, when i said it my voice was so shaky. after that i changed the 'subject' very fast. i dont knoe what will happened further.. its the lack of experience that makes me so veryvery nervous and scared..
i wanted to share it coz i thought maybe this could inspire those of u who have severe SP, like i do, and have never 'been' with girls for more than a few secs..