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oNecoOlazN oNecoOlazN is offline
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Sometimes i can barely make a simple phone call bc i get so nervous that i end of mixing up words or having to ask the other line over and over again what heshe just said..and then my family eventually has to take over the phone....

And why is making a phone call so damn scary..?...how do you survive like this..?..
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I'm certainly not stupid but anxiety causes me to try to not think so much and that can cause you to have less brain activity and i've heard can cause you to eventually be less intelligent but to me, it sounds like it's just your anxiety so don't worry about it and just keep what i said in mind.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oNecoOlazN View Post
Sometimes i can barely make a simple phone call bc i get so nervous that i end of mixing up words or having to ask the other line over and over again what heshe just said..and then my family eventually has to take over the phone....

And why is making a phone call so damn scary..?...how do you survive like this..?..
Write. Everything. Down.

Have everything you want to say written down in large, clear text on paper in front of you.
Also think of any possible questions the person you will be talking to in the phone call may ask you. Have these possible questions - and their answers written underneath them - also written down in front of you, all ready to simply read from.
Doing this, was the only thing that stopped my heart rate from thumping up to the level it would be, if I was being attacked by a grizzly bear.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lily View Post
I'm certainly not stupid but anxiety causes me to try to not think so much and that can cause you to have less brain activity and i've heard can cause you to eventually be less intelligent but to me, it sounds like it's just your anxiety so don't worry about it and just keep what i said in mind.
Trying not to think wont cause less brain activity and wont make you less intelligent.

SA is basically a hijacking of the brain by emotions. A trigger will cause an avalanche of emotion causing the area of the brain that deals with critical thinking and rational thought to stop working as it should. Its your brain having a runaway thought process happen.
A faulty thinking pattern.

Thats why you get tongue tied, anxious etc. So I dont see how having SA can make you stupid but it can certainly make you feel stupid.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueDays View Post
Write. Everything. Down.

Have everything you want to say written down in large, clear text on paper in front of you.
Also think of any possible questions the person you will be talking to in the phone call may ask you. Have these possible questions - and their answers written underneath them - also written down in front of you, all ready to simply read from.
Doing this, was the only thing that stopped my heart rate from thumping up to the level it would be, if I was being attacked by a grizzly bear.
Lol I do that all the time. It makes you feel stupid because it takes you an hour to prepare for a silly phone call, but it makes you sound smarter when you finally make the stupid phone call.
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Well, I don't know if it's social anxiety that makes me stupid, but I think it's more about missing on social cues. A lot of people don't understand that my brain takes a lot longer to process information. Sometimes I would accidentally make a comment to someone without realizing that it might sound inappropriate to them.

I don't mean to, but it's just something that slips from my mouth every now and then. Most people who I've been around seem like they are able to function normally than me when it comes to following directions or just understanding what it is they're talking about.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oNecoOlazN View Post
Sometimes i can barely make a simple phone call bc i get so nervous that i end of mixing up words or having to ask the other line over and over again what heshe just said..and then my family eventually has to take over the phone....

And why is making a phone call so damn scary..?...how do you survive like this..?..
I am the exact same way, my husband has to do the phone calls

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I agree with blue days, I don't have to do it now but I would before have to write down what I was going to say while I was staring at the phone trying to be brave enough to put that last number in.
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I believe I lose at least 85% of my intellect when I have to step out in public
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What BlueDays said is a good start on how to get past this. Just write stuff down, make mental and/or physical notes on the things you know you need to talk about before making the call.

But, really, the only way to really learn is experience. Continually doing it over and over. Making mistakes and learning from your mistakes. You don't have to become a master orator but learning how to have conversations is a good, if not essential, skill in living a fulfilling life. So, no, you're not stupid for not being the best at talking with others. We all have things we're not so good at, but it never makes us dumb or stupid because we don't know.
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