Do you keep losing friends?

faithnomore

Banned
Its like a curse of mine. I make friends, and then after a while they seem to get bored or something... They just get to the point where they aren't interested anymore.

Anyone else have this problem!?

Its soul destroying, because I seem to be getting on fine, and all of a sudden its like i'm a disease or something :roll:
 

faithnomore

Banned
SilentClaude said:
Yes, but because of low self-esteem I didn't keep in touch and just let them come to me. Then, when they stopped bothering with me, it damaged my self-esteem even more. Vicious circle.

I have that same problem. Its good to know i'm not alone. Its good to find out what i am doing wrong, because i'm the kind of person that doesn't realise what i do wrong.
 

autumn_82

Well-known member
I have the same problem, but lately it hasn't been for lack of trying with the few people I know. Some of them just don't bother to call me back, although they make a big deal about wanting to meet up and do something, which I guess is just polite BS. The other friend will do something with me if I call her, but she hasn't made contact with me in the past 7 months. So I guess they have better things to do.

It does get severely depressing after a while. I've been told I just have to keep trying, and I guess that's true. Part of my problem is that I meet a few people, we don't really click, so I think I'm a hopeless case. I guess I have to try and talk with more people, which I don't exactly have an easy time doing, or a high tolerance for. Maybe some people are just not as appealing to the general population, and so it's harder for them (me) to meet like-minded individuals.

Hopefully eventually I'll meet others who actually enjoy my company and give me a call once in a while rather than me feeling like I have to make all the effort or I'll never hear from them again.
 

xabbashiax

Active member
I haven't had that many proper friends and the friends I used tio have were disrespectful to me. I'm kind of scared to make friends because. I feel like lookswise i may seem intertesting but once they've been with me 4 a while they'll loose interest and ditch me, like the others. Thats one of my worst fears having someone like me and then realise that i'm not worth their time and ditch me.
 

ripewithdecay

Well-known member
Yeah I have the same problem for sure. The feeling I get from new 'friends' also after a while is that they start to look down on me, and they act like they know me so well, but they really don't at all.
 

autumn_82

Well-known member
xabbashiax said:
I haven't had that many proper friends and the friends I used tio have were disrespectful to me. I'm kind of scared to make friends because. I feel like lookswise i may seem intertesting but once they've been with me 4 a while they'll loose interest and ditch me, like the others. Thats one of my worst fears having someone like me and then realise that i'm not worth their time and ditch me.

Ditto! I feel the same, and have the same thing happen to me. It's demoralizing yet also kind of enfuriating. I do get invited out once in a while, but I'm just really anxious about failing due to being shy and awkward. I mean, It's happened in the past and I really have gotten sick of messing up, so I avoid it altogether. I think in my case it takes the right person for me to be able to even talk normally. Otherwise I clam up completely and they don't ask me back because I was so....weird/boring? Where are all the off-beat people at? LOL.
 

limetree

Well-known member
Yes, but because of low self-esteem I didn't keep in touch and just let them come to me. Then, when they stopped bothering with me, it damaged my self-esteem even more. Vicious circle.

This is exactly what happens with me, although I try to make a little bit of effort, I just don't think it translates well. My friend has told me about ten times ever since a few months ago "let's hang out sometime, haven't seen you for ages" so we made a vague plan for yesterday. She normally drives to pick me up but she either keeps forgetting or she doesn't want to tell me straight out she doesn't want to spend time with me anymore. It's friday and according to some facebook statuses she's hanging out with some other friends, wtf I would've rathered her not make any plans at all. I don't really feel like confronting her about it so I guess I have no reason to complain. She just hasn't really been replying to my online comments either when a few weeks ago she was proud of me for starting therapy, bit confusing or maybe I'm getting too carried away with worse case scenarios. It would really frustrate me if the idea of an "official diagnosis" would somehow make shyness so much more awkward. Sometimes I feel so like argh, f-uck needing any friends!!
 
well i dont maintain them, friendship is like a plant, ya gotta give some effort and some of that has to be returned back somehow if there is non of that then there aint gonna be no fruit
 

juju

Active member
really, isnt friendship meant to be a natural non-threatening thing. I mean if it causes so much stress maybe it wasnt meant to be
 

NickyNacker

Well-known member
Yes, I always lose friends! I had a bestfriend that I met in 4th grade and was bestfriends with for 8 years and we got into a huge fight in september and he hasn't talked to me since. I tried adding him on Facebook, and he denied the friend request. Then I sent him a message, and he ignored it. Makes me very sad. I'm about to lose my other best friend too because she started school and every time she talks to me she's a huge bitch and treats me like crap.
 

legs13

Member
Yea...I have the same kind of problem...I have been living long distance for so long...now that I have come back, it's hard to catch up and relate after having missed so much time together. I guess meeting up again and keeping up appearances will help me get back to the close friendship we once held.
 

plus 44

Member
Yes, I also have the same problem............... I'm losing friends too and its hard to talk to them
 

Lemans

Member
I only click from time to time with nerds and outsiders, when I'm in a crowd of "popular" people my anxiety gets pretty high. Majority of friends I've had have been of the dorky type, so i guess that makes me a dork.
 
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caissa825

Member
I tend not to have many friends, and some have been lost due to my inability to stay in contact/ go out and do things, especially if they are "phone people" and like going out a lot ... I have one friend I would love to stay in touch with via email but she only wants to talk on the phone, which I can't always do.
 

jamez

Well-known member
Be comfortable with yourself.

Friends come and go with anyone not just social phobics.

It's part of life.
 
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