Do I currently have "PURE O" now? Sensorimotor OCD

Hi, let me start by saying i'm new to this forum but have read many posts here which have helped me considerably. I'm really in need for advice/help/suggestions...anything. Basically, in a nutshell i've had OCD all my life. It started with perfectionism and straightening things perfectly, it then went to tapping light switches or objects, and then counting came along. I always counted in "2's"....2, 4, 6, 8, etc. I've had OCD since I was a kid, and it got worse as I grew up. I'm 36 now, and as crazy as OCD is, it's even crazier I lived with it as long as I did before I even knew what the heck it was. I saw a show "Obsessed" and shortly after that about a year ago, I realized I actually had OCD. Anyway, I have probably read hundreds of hours on OCD since then and there's good news and bad news. The good news is that with a ton of effort and hard work i've managed over the last year to completely eliminate all my counting, tapping, straightening, cleaning,stuck thoughts, where i'd think about something and couldn't shake the thought, etc! It took a long time but since i've eliminated those specific types of OCD, my anxiety has almost completely disappeared, as has my depression. This has allowed me to regain control in my life....to some extent.

This is where the issues lies, currently. After those symptoms were gone, don't ask me how, but the OCD seemed to find a way to get at me, yet again. And that is with odd "thoughts" vs. the compulsions. The thoughts revolve around why people's hands move when they talk and how it's basically meaningless as it isn't exactly sign language so my OCD said to me "FOCUS ON THAT, WHY DO PEOPLE, INCLUDING YOURSELF DO THAT WHEN TALKING". That spiraled into breathing, blinking, mouth movement,swallowing, etc. After doing some searching I came to find that was called "sensorimotor OCD". My concern is that while my anxiety is nearly completely gone, and I don't give these OCD thoughts the time of day, they still come into my head because when they initially came present is at a time when I had very high anxiety. What's most difficult is the fact that I could be focused on something completely unrelated to any of this sensorimotor OCD, but if someone's hands move or if I have saliva in my mouth, JUST THE SENSATION triggers the thought.

Just the sensation alone triggers the thoughts. It's almost like I had thought about this meaningless stuff so much when I was highly anxious that it's ETCHED into my mind. I mean most people swallow, blink, breathe..naturally, they don't think about it. In my case this is what my OCD latched onto so I'm doing my best to deal with it, but it's tough. I really would like to ask advice here on my current OCD SYMPTOMS and whether or not this is 'PURE O' and if anyone else here has had or has these sensorimotor OCD symptoms, and if so, what are you doing to deal with them?

I hope this wasn't too detailed, I didn't want to post a few sentences without a little detail. I'm really looking forward to any advice on this and thanks in advance to any replies that may come my way.

I didn't realise I had ocd for a really long time too I wish they had those shows back then or more awareness where I live so I wouldn't be so degraded in life, nobody knows but one guy and some others from online but it's better late that you found out than never. It is Pure O or purely obsessional but if you take away the labels from everything you will find that it is also a compulsion to focus on these things rather than choice. As you said ocd will latch onto everything and it doesn't matter the subject, it's quite normal for the probelm to go away then come back sometimes ten fold. I've had many minor useless ocd problems before revolving around worser ones like sexual issues and physical work etc from precise worries and confusion to loud noises and thinking things will explode, being oversensitive to it and stuff. It goes away but comes back as something else as a weaker or stronger force. I focused on something till it became my next ocd problem forgetting about the last one and eventually it faded slowly.

Patrick, thanks for your reply. I know there's a lot of people out there and on this forum affected with OCD in a variety of ways and it's really tough to deal with much of the time. I try to talk to myself logically but as most know that doesn't usually work. I mean the one key word with OCD is "repetitive." Thoughts, compulsions, obsessions,....and so I try to tell myself if I thought about ANYTHING enough times at some point it's gonna get etched into your mind..which is basically what OCD is.

What I noticed with myself with this sensorimotor OCD is that I've gotten better with the intrusive thoughts. When they enter, I don't give them a lot of energy or get anxious. That makes them go away pretty quickly, so I can start to focus on something else. The issue though is that while I'm not spending lengthy amounts of time analyzing these thoughts, they still detract from what my focus was. When I first had these thoughts they consumed me more, because it was just more OCD frustration so I could think about itching, breathing, hand-movements, etc, for hours at at a time once the thought kicked in and my anxiety was extremely high because it was like fighting the thoughts and trying to NOT THINK ABOUT THEM while THINKING about them. Which I later read, that's the exact thing that FUELS OCD. That "White Elephant Theory".

But it almost seems at this point like it has become a habit because I had the repetitive thoughts for so long when my anxiety was high, it's as I mentioned, like they are just etched into my mind. I looked up and found local group therapy which specializes in CBT and Exposure Therapy. For the type of OCD i'm dealing with, would this type of therapy be helpful? Or what about medication...would medication be helpful for my symptoms at all? At this point, I'm willing to give anything a shot, but anyone with experience with either therapy and/or medication and can offer feedback would be much appreciated.

hey tron, im 17 and i have had these sensorimotor obsessions for over five years now, its ruined my life. its mainly breathing and blinking, i just cant stop thinking about it and i just cant stop doing it. id really like to talk to you because i always thought i was the only one, i was alone and that i was weird. it would be really good to talk to someone who is going through the same ****, and we can probably help each other. do you have facebook?