Do guys like girls for non-look associated reasons?

losttroy

losttroy

Well-known member
yuletide said:
Yes I want to have sex. Its just meaningless to me unless its with that person. Although I really wanted to adopt kids, as opposed to having my own. Hm. ;(
I cannot find any statistics.
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Crap! Sorry, I was replying to Dub16. Forgot to quote them. Yes, you should only be intimate with someone who loves you, and for more than just something superficial. My English profs at school always say in our philosophical discussions about romance and stuff..."beauty fades with the stroke of the clock. But true love endures the test of time.":cool:

I believe that.:) I want to be ninety years old someday with my best friend there next to me. She may not have been hot now for like 50 years! But she's still my sweetie pie. That's when love really shows you how wonderful it can be for our lives.:)
Just think about what Kat said above...hang in there and eventually you'll find a nice kernel of wheat in that crappy chaff!
 
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Emily_G

Well-known member
flakeybark said:
By wearing makeup and trying to look good you're setting yourself up as something that is to be looked at so maybe you should start there instead of blaming other people.
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Yeah...that's like saying "she asked to be raped because she wore a miniskirt".
 
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Emily_G

Well-known member
genius said:
try to talk to religious people they dont make sexual relationships outside marrage so any religious single man you look not have any sexual Intentions
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Not sure if you were talking about Christian men....but Christians are no different than anyone else. We *try* not to sin, but it doesn't mean we always succeed at that.
 
losttroy

losttroy

Well-known member
I agree! I've always heard when you fail at a relationship, you should try meeting nicer people at Church. Not true. Some religious sects even demand women intentionally uglify themselves so they aren't attractive anymore. Sexual differentiation is a given sometimes, I guess. But genetics doesn't make inequality right, EVER.
 
genius

genius

Well-known member
yuletide with bleach said:
whoooah

Step into reality here and look at the TV. Look at magazines. Sorry i have to sound predictable..

Im just doing what i can...
Now im blaming people?? Since when?? Siiigh : (

If girls aren't supposed to be hot (because they're asking for it if they are) and they're not supposed to be ugly (i dont need to explain that one) ... well you know where im going with that.

Do you follow my logic at all :mad:
I dont care if i sound outdated.

I am just trying to point you in a reasonable direction. Don't tell me its my fault for trying.. Thats outrageous....
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i agree with flakeybark in some points but not all because what you wear and how you looks always send a message. im not saying that wearing makeup and trying to look good is worng but i mean when the girl try to look very good that always send the wrong message ofcourse this is not you this is just an example
 
genius

genius

Well-known member
Emily_G said:
Not sure if you were talking about Christian men....but Christians are no different than anyone else. We *try* not to sin, but it doesn't mean we always succeed at that.
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yes im talking about christians im christian and for me its impossible to have a sexual relationship before or outside marrage i think it the same for Jewish too

it hard for me to understand why to do it outside marrage anyway
 
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shadowfighter86

New member
the think is most guys are in it for the sex or just treating the women like a trophy. if you have a beautiful female freind and your haging out with her too munch then people will most likely think your in it for the sex because society dictates it.

their are tons of girls out theres with good looks but ugly personalitys.
 
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Emily_G

Well-known member
genius said:
yes im talking about christians im christian and for me its impossible to have a sexual relationship before or outside marrage i think it the same for Jewish too

it hard for me to understand why to do it outside marrage anyway
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It's not impossible, just sinful to do so :) And most of the time Christians engage in premarital sex because it's hard to wait.
 
nopark

nopark

Well-known member
I'm a guy and looks are not very important to me. I don't think I'm the prettiest flower in the bunch, so maybe that has had an impact on my priorities ;) But I value personality and smarts the most -- I like a girl that is smarter than I am. So my definition of attractive are those two traits. Good looks aren't very important when held in comparison to those.

But I, like Dub16, don't immediately think of sex when I meet a girl (well those opportunities are few and far between anyway!). I've had a few close female friends and I never wanted to make it sexual. So I think it's completely possible to have a friendly relationship.

Though you females are strange creatures; you definitely keep me on my toes ::p:
 
losttroy

losttroy

Well-known member
No! Why I made that comment because you said this:
"If all guys are just after sex then I mustnt be a guy at all."

That implied to me you don't care about sex at all. You are a human being, so you are supposed to care, and if you don't, well, that's where the "asexual" connotation lay for me.::eek:: I never said you should hit on your friends, though, no matter how much regard you should or shouldn't have for the horizontal mambo. And, personally, I think what you last said was simply beautiful in terms of how one should treat friends who are of the opposing sex.:)

I apologize if I offended you.::(:
 
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yuletide with bleach

Active member
Kat said:
You need to find a clear understanding of what you want in a guy, instead of trying to become what you think is ideal for them. After all, you want to attract a guy based on being yourself. You will never be at peace in a relationship if you’re not being yourself.

Being yourself doesn’t mean you can’t dress up, it may attract guys that are only interested in your looks but not dressing up can do the same thing. It just depends what they are attracted to.
I guess it depends on the type of guy you want to attract. If you’re a person that dresses up mostly and enjoy it then you should do that because that’s what you do but if you’re a person that like to dress plainly or in between that’s what you should do.

No one can tell you who you are, just hang in there, and eventually you will find him.
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THats not really my issue. I am avoidant.

I dont even understand why i get spooked before a relationship forms. It doesnt make sense.
I wish i didnt scare people when i opened my mouth as much but it seems no matter what i do i make that mistake. I am too odd and crazy and expressive .. which is hard to control... so i just usually run away. Being yourself is easier said than done.
 
Kat

Kat

Well-known member
yuletide with bleach said:
THats not really my issue. I am avoidant.

I dont even understand why i get spooked before a relationship forms. It doesnt make sense.
I wish i didnt scare people when i opened my mouth as much but it seems no matter what i do i make that mistake. I am too odd and crazy and expressive .. which is hard to control... so i just usually run away. Being yourself is easier said than done.
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True, it is easier said than done but like most things in life not impossible. ;)
Persistence is the key!

and you having that awkwardness as you call it is being yourself because it’s part of you at this stage in life whether you want it to be there or not.

You could try talking to guys online that you meet in real life, that way they can get to you on an emotional comfort level for you.
 
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