Detachment from life and activities

FooFighter

FooFighter

Member
This is the first time that I've used a website to reach out to people who share my experience with depression, anxiety and similar symptoms (social phobia)

I just turned 21 this past Wednesday, and unfortunately I spent my 21st alone, the only celebration that I had was going to a bar with my dad for a couple of hours. I find it hard to get motivated to do anything anymore, even returning phone calls or trying to keep in touch with friends seems like a daunting task for me. All of my past activities and hobbies that I used to love to do I find no interest in. (Going to the gym, going to hang out with friends, riding my motorcycle ect...) I have detached myself from my friends and almost never leave my house. I've always had depression but I can usually control it and have a somewhat normal life. However now I have no direction in life and any social situation (as simple as going to the store) intimidates me to a point.

If anyone on this site is dealing with a similar situation, or has lived through this experience I could really use some advice. I want to reconnect with friends and start getting over my social anxiety. I want to have my life back.

Thanks in advance for the help
 
Selenio

Selenio

Active member
FooFighter said:
This is the first time that I've used a website to reach out to people who share my experience with depression, anxiety and similar symptoms (social phobia)

I just turned 21 this past Wednesday, and unfortunately I spent my 21st alone, the only celebration that I had was going to a bar with my dad for a couple of hours. I find it hard to get motivated to do anything anymore, even returning phone calls or trying to keep in touch with friends seems like a daunting task for me. All of my past activities and hobbies that I used to love to do I find no interest in. (Going to the gym, going to hang out with friends, riding my motorcycle ect...) I have detached myself from my friends and almost never leave my house. I've always had depression but I can usually control it and have a somewhat normal life. However now I have no direction in life and any social situation (as simple as going to the store) intimidates me to a point.

If anyone on this site is dealing with a similar situation, or has lived through this experience I could really use some advice. I want to reconnect with friends and start getting over my social anxiety. I want to have my life back.

Thanks in advance for the help
Click to expand...

do you have a psycholog?
 
B

bsammy

Well-known member
i suggest a therapist...im older than you and have felt this detachment from activities for many years now..detachment from friends and family, i have to force myself to do social things and other activities and rarely if ever enjoy them..not a good place to be...
 
TLB

TLB

Well-known member
Unfortunately my life is exactly the same. My life has completely turned around (for the worse) in the last 2 years, and like you, I just want my old life back but it seems impossible. I'm here to chat if you need me.
 
WeirdyMcGee

WeirdyMcGee

Well-known member
I can pretty much guarantee that most of the forum members have felt like this at some point in their lives; or are experiencing the same detachment that you describe right now.

As for myself, I'm going on 7 years without much improvement but I *do* have one good friend whom I keep in contact with. I'm medicated and go to therapy 2 times a month (though I haven't been since last fall-- I hope to re-start sometime soon)

Therapy is a good place to start.
Some people just need a little boost; doing exercises in therapy and/or starting on a low dose medication for depression/anxiety can help them out of their rut!
Maybe that's all you need?
And if not-- it's a start and at least you're doing *something*!

Welcome to the forum!
 
Argentum

Argentum

Well-known member
bsammy said:
i suggest a therapist...im older than you and have felt this detachment from activities for many years now..detachment from friends and family, i have to force myself to do social things and other activities and rarely if ever enjoy them..not a good place to be...
Click to expand...

I would also recommend having a professional to talk to if you don't already.

Unfortunately, I've found that the only thing to do is to push forward. Send a few friendly texts. Sit down for coffee. Make a phone call. If friendships aren't maintained at least a little bit, they might not be there when you really need someone to give you a leg up.
 
Flowers-Of-Bloom

Flowers-Of-Bloom

Well-known member
I am also in the same situation, I'm 22 and spent my 21st with only my closest family, not even my extended family, and friends are out of the question. I guess there isn't much I can say that will help other than don't ever think you're the only one. It's so hard and it's what we must go through and I know it seems unfair since there are so many people who don't struggle with this but everyone has to go through some troubling circumstances or they won't grow. I think in this situation we are our own worst enemies but at the same time we are the only person that can truly help ourselves and overcome this. Our will is what will make us get through this, medication and therapy can certainly help give that boost that we need but it's up to us as individuals to really do the work to improve ourselves and it all takes time if you're willing.
 
W

WalkAlone

1
You need to do exactly that, go out and hang with friends. Talking about it, wondering about it, dreaming about it, etc isn't going to do anything for you. If you feel uncomfortable about something maybe you need to change friends or change your activities etc. It is not unusual to completely lose friends and/or make new ones as well as doing something different with your life. It is the attempt to hang onto certain things that actually stagnates peoples' lives. If friends have moved on to other things or don't like you anymore then you must move on as well. If your old activities aren't fulfilling you then you need to come up with new ones and adapt to differences in life. Being an adult is all about adapting. What you are experiencing is quite normal. Lots of people lose their friends around your age as friends move on with life. It is also confusing to a young adult about what to do with their life. So like I say, this is experienced by majority of people so don't feel like a loser/weirdo. Don't rush things and take your time figuring out where you want your life headed. If you make good decisions everything else will fall into place.
 
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