mr.jimbo
Active member
As you can tell above my topic, i have a disorder. Along side, i am dealing with depression and anxiety. Please take the time to read this. sorry if this gets boring and/or confusing. also... excuse my grammars. not sure if anyone is going to read all this, but im hoping someone has something to say and share their personal stories with Learning disability while in college.
okay so here's my little stories.....
(sort of a summary)
after finishing high school, i went to a community college for the first 2 years. And then i dropped out and took a year in a half break from school. Now I'm back to school the second time at a different school to rejuvenate or start fresh all over again. i feel like repeating some of the courses i've taken in the past, because im not satisfied of what i've learned. Plus, i took a long break, so im pretty rusty or forgot most of what i've learned at my first community college.
Let me tell you what happen at my first community college experience. To be honest, i went to college bluntly with no purposes and goals. before i started my first semester, i received a letter and a brochure to join the DSPS program (disability special program service), because i was in special education since k-12. which, the local community college knew that i was in special education or RSP from high school. I totally ignored it and never joined them. i thought i would do fine without the program. So anyways, the first half through the semesters, i was getting decent grades. Until the last half of my semesters, classes were getting harder, and i started failing all my classes. As a result, I made a decision to drop out and decide to take a break from college because i was feeling distressed. I realized a lot about myself during those long breaks.
In the middle of those long breaks, thats when i found that i have ADD, social phobia or anxiety, and depression. i went to see a therapist/psychiatrist temporarily at that time. But, i can't really validate the right disorders specifically of what i have, because i dont think they thoroughly tested on me. One thing i can prove is that i have ADD base on my research, my therapist seeing those signs, and my learning disability being in special education(RSP). the only medication i tried was "lexapro" for the depression for about 8 weeks. i hated the side effects and was very hesitant to take anti-depression. plus, it wasn't working for me. I don't plan on trying different anti-depression with keeping up stronger dosage, because i have hepatitis B so the liver is very sensitive. regardless, I'm against taking these type of drugs. I believe finding it in a natural way.
currently now, I am back to school the second time, at a different community college, in my first semester. I'm actually on the DSPS program THIS TIME, and im going to see a personal counselor(therapist) at the campus to deal with my issues next week. apparently, for the past week or two, i've been having mood swings for no explanation of sadness and giving up school work in a instant. I really have a purposes and reasons on why i want to go to college. I really do look forward having dreams and goals but this lack of motivation is killing me. its a on and off switch thing, where i can't just stick my motivation and focus consistently. I don't want to fall back behind and make that same mistakes like my first college school experience. I feel like im the only one not moving on while the rest of the people i know around my age is about to graduate and get their college degree. which i really dont care much, but i thought its funny to know why im the only one still stuck and can't move on.
I truly understand how life works in general. i accept who i am as a person. im not letting health issues get into my head and worrying so much. at the moment, what can i do when in a low income family, less work experience including to deal with multiple disorders and feel like im not ready to work, and not be able to afford health insurance? the only thing i can go to is health services at school. best way i can think of survival at being disadvantage of my life is exercising, staying positive, keeping myself occupied to not worry so much or avoid negatives thoughts, and forcing myself to study 2-3 times harder at school, until by the time things get a little better in the near future. i hope and pray for myself that things will fall into place.
Last note, for those of you who experience with learning disability while in college/university, i would REALLY appreciate to hear some of your stories with your struggles and success. I like to know how you guys conquer these challenges and what tips or advice you guys can give me. I will be very much appreciate and thankful. I'm still having a hard time moving forward. thanks.
-Jimmy-
okay so here's my little stories.....
(sort of a summary)
after finishing high school, i went to a community college for the first 2 years. And then i dropped out and took a year in a half break from school. Now I'm back to school the second time at a different school to rejuvenate or start fresh all over again. i feel like repeating some of the courses i've taken in the past, because im not satisfied of what i've learned. Plus, i took a long break, so im pretty rusty or forgot most of what i've learned at my first community college.
Let me tell you what happen at my first community college experience. To be honest, i went to college bluntly with no purposes and goals. before i started my first semester, i received a letter and a brochure to join the DSPS program (disability special program service), because i was in special education since k-12. which, the local community college knew that i was in special education or RSP from high school. I totally ignored it and never joined them. i thought i would do fine without the program. So anyways, the first half through the semesters, i was getting decent grades. Until the last half of my semesters, classes were getting harder, and i started failing all my classes. As a result, I made a decision to drop out and decide to take a break from college because i was feeling distressed. I realized a lot about myself during those long breaks.
In the middle of those long breaks, thats when i found that i have ADD, social phobia or anxiety, and depression. i went to see a therapist/psychiatrist temporarily at that time. But, i can't really validate the right disorders specifically of what i have, because i dont think they thoroughly tested on me. One thing i can prove is that i have ADD base on my research, my therapist seeing those signs, and my learning disability being in special education(RSP). the only medication i tried was "lexapro" for the depression for about 8 weeks. i hated the side effects and was very hesitant to take anti-depression. plus, it wasn't working for me. I don't plan on trying different anti-depression with keeping up stronger dosage, because i have hepatitis B so the liver is very sensitive. regardless, I'm against taking these type of drugs. I believe finding it in a natural way.
currently now, I am back to school the second time, at a different community college, in my first semester. I'm actually on the DSPS program THIS TIME, and im going to see a personal counselor(therapist) at the campus to deal with my issues next week. apparently, for the past week or two, i've been having mood swings for no explanation of sadness and giving up school work in a instant. I really have a purposes and reasons on why i want to go to college. I really do look forward having dreams and goals but this lack of motivation is killing me. its a on and off switch thing, where i can't just stick my motivation and focus consistently. I don't want to fall back behind and make that same mistakes like my first college school experience. I feel like im the only one not moving on while the rest of the people i know around my age is about to graduate and get their college degree. which i really dont care much, but i thought its funny to know why im the only one still stuck and can't move on.
I truly understand how life works in general. i accept who i am as a person. im not letting health issues get into my head and worrying so much. at the moment, what can i do when in a low income family, less work experience including to deal with multiple disorders and feel like im not ready to work, and not be able to afford health insurance? the only thing i can go to is health services at school. best way i can think of survival at being disadvantage of my life is exercising, staying positive, keeping myself occupied to not worry so much or avoid negatives thoughts, and forcing myself to study 2-3 times harder at school, until by the time things get a little better in the near future. i hope and pray for myself that things will fall into place.
Last note, for those of you who experience with learning disability while in college/university, i would REALLY appreciate to hear some of your stories with your struggles and success. I like to know how you guys conquer these challenges and what tips or advice you guys can give me. I will be very much appreciate and thankful. I'm still having a hard time moving forward. thanks.
-Jimmy-
