destructoroflife
Well-known member
Hello, as you can see I'm new around here.
So I've decided to tell the "story of my life", here it goes:
I'm 21 years old, I was born and raised in one of the so called "third world countries".
I believe there are some parameters that constitute an individual:
Religion defines morality. Education feeds intelligence and perception of the world. And society defines us (or at least it tries) as an individual.
I was raised by a christian-protestant family, I have a high sense of morality. Some people say I'm too conservative, it may be true.
Though I love this morality, sometimes it can affect me in a negative way, by not being an "open-minded" person.
In terms of my education, well, it was ok. Nothing really impressive. My parents are educated too, so they value education over anything else (which I think is good).
I am a logic-driven person. For this I get upset when people act irrationally, and because of that I have problems with my parents, as they are too religious.
And in my society, you have to be outgoing, talkative, especially if you're a man (I believe this reality applies in almost all the world).
So, how did I ended up being like I am? Or why did I ended up like this? I'm not too sure.
My dad used to beat me up, you know "correctional methods". So everythime I did something wrong (c'mmon, I was a kid, I'd be doing wrong things all the time) I knew that when I get home, something bad was expecting me. Sometimes I didn't even have to get home for the punishment.
This "correctional methods" made me a very passive person. I saw my dad on every man or woman of authority, sometimes just normal individuals.
I was not allowed to have an opinion because I thought that by thinking differently I would get beaten.
So I was a very shy kid in school, high school, college. Almost no friends, 0 girlfriends. I was (I am) socially stupid. I don't know how to react to people's emotions.
I'm scared of people. Scared of being critized, of doing something stupid. You know, all of those fears that constitute the AvPD individual.
I'm also ugly, so that did not help at all.
I've left college. Being in my house for almost 5 months, not going outside. I have developed agoraphobia now. I have no idea how to get through this.
I hate my parents, I've never been a "warm" son to them really. I never talk to them, it's just awkward being in the same room with them for too long. There's nothing to talk about really.
I feel they just ****ed me so bad.
Well, that's all.
Sorry if my english is not too good.
Thank's for reading.
So I've decided to tell the "story of my life", here it goes:
I'm 21 years old, I was born and raised in one of the so called "third world countries".
I believe there are some parameters that constitute an individual:
Religion defines morality. Education feeds intelligence and perception of the world. And society defines us (or at least it tries) as an individual.
I was raised by a christian-protestant family, I have a high sense of morality. Some people say I'm too conservative, it may be true.
Though I love this morality, sometimes it can affect me in a negative way, by not being an "open-minded" person.
In terms of my education, well, it was ok. Nothing really impressive. My parents are educated too, so they value education over anything else (which I think is good).
I am a logic-driven person. For this I get upset when people act irrationally, and because of that I have problems with my parents, as they are too religious.
And in my society, you have to be outgoing, talkative, especially if you're a man (I believe this reality applies in almost all the world).
So, how did I ended up being like I am? Or why did I ended up like this? I'm not too sure.
My dad used to beat me up, you know "correctional methods". So everythime I did something wrong (c'mmon, I was a kid, I'd be doing wrong things all the time) I knew that when I get home, something bad was expecting me. Sometimes I didn't even have to get home for the punishment.
This "correctional methods" made me a very passive person. I saw my dad on every man or woman of authority, sometimes just normal individuals.
I was not allowed to have an opinion because I thought that by thinking differently I would get beaten.
So I was a very shy kid in school, high school, college. Almost no friends, 0 girlfriends. I was (I am) socially stupid. I don't know how to react to people's emotions.
I'm scared of people. Scared of being critized, of doing something stupid. You know, all of those fears that constitute the AvPD individual.
I'm also ugly, so that did not help at all.
I've left college. Being in my house for almost 5 months, not going outside. I have developed agoraphobia now. I have no idea how to get through this.
I hate my parents, I've never been a "warm" son to them really. I never talk to them, it's just awkward being in the same room with them for too long. There's nothing to talk about really.
I feel they just ****ed me so bad.
Well, that's all.
Sorry if my english is not too good.
Thank's for reading.
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