What do you live for, when there is nothing to live for?

TucanSam

Member
I have very few friends, and none I would call close (in proximity or in relation). I have a job, and school, but have no drive to really do anything anymore. I recently lost the great love of my life, and have a hard time imagining ever loving again. It's been about a year and a half since I broke up with her, and I still have not found myself over her. I used to enjoy writing, drawing, singing, but just dont have a passion for those anymore. I am on antidepressants, but they don't seem to be making things better. I think about suicide everyday. Not in a, I want to kill myself way, but in a Why should I keep living sort of way. I just don't really see much of a point to life anymore. There isnt really anything I havent done that I want to, or think I'll have the chance to do. does anyone else struggle with this?
 

Fen

Well-known member
I just care about my parents in this world.
For the time being I never think about suicide, they would suffer too much.

Maybe in the future, who knows.
 

bsammy

Well-known member
hmm tough to answer as i think the same way..life simply has very little meaning for me..even when i had friends and girls liking me in the past i still had very little desire to keep going forward.life seems like way too much effort compared to what little reward/enjoyment i get out of it..
 

greenglowbindi

New member
This is hard. Perhaps, if you had one or more things that you could consciously utilize to simply redirect your attention for awhile away from the pain that is seems to be gnawing at you. Maybe create a box of items such as favorite music, dvds- humourous, artwork that uplifts, photos of nature, really anything that has the power to uplift you and to momentarily distract. This could be a possible single solution to short term mood uplift. If you can do this when you have the symptoms hitting you especially hard, it may help.
I wish you well...
 

fitftw

Well-known member
TucanSam, I feel the same way except I'm worse off than you. I do not have a job. I have no desire to get a job. I've had every day off for the last 3 years and spent them in my apartment playing videogames or doing other unproductive useless bull****. I'm just waiting for the day I die. I've had my fill of trying to understand life's purpose. I'm just going to sit back and watch other people work their hands to the bone for stuff they don't need.

Nothing matters.
 

Blabla..

Well-known member
Hey Tucansam ,

i say , if you don't find a reason to live anymore , just live to help others , this is the best you can do , and you will see how much good it will do to others , and to you also
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
I recently lost the great love of my life, and have a hard time imagining ever loving again. It's been about a year and a half since I broke up with her, and I still have not found myself over her.
You have not let go properly. Have you considered going to a relationship therapist? It may not be the best idea but it could certainly help you along the way to get over your ex. It may even help you focus more of your energies on your other passions and maybe even find another girl.

I think about suicide everyday. Not in a, I want to kill myself way, but in a Why should I keep living sort of way. I just don't really see much of a point to life anymore.
Yeah, I have this same problem all the time. The futility of life plays on my mind and it's hard to shake. This is another reason why you should talk to someone...you might be able to set off a spark that rekindles your old hobbies and interests. That way you can be happier. :)

I don't know what you're like, but I've found music is one of the only things getting me out of bed in the morning. It's always there no matter what, and I love listening to it. It's therapeutic in a way, despite me listening to quite abrasive music. If music is a big part of your life, embrace it.
 

guy29

Member
I think just the fact that you're asking the question, means you have something to live for. You just may be too afraid to own up to it, have it stashed away because you're so fearful of it. But just remember, if you are that fearful of it, then the reward must be equally great; thus, you must go for it. Summon any courage, therapy tricks you have and go for it, because that is what you live for.
 

det0ks

Member
I remember when I was at this point. Find something that motivates you. At 18 I was in your shoes. Finished HS (had to finish at a continutation, not enough creds). Felt like I had a late start in life since I was 18 and still jobless, graduated a year later than I should have, Had pretty much no friends, played video games all day. I told myself, I have to do something, get up, get out. Im not a good socializer, so I thought of a place I could go where I could interact with people, but don't necessarily have to get to know them. I found that in basketball. Pick up games with random people, some of which became regular bball buddies, taught me a few things. Im still nowhere near where I want to be (socially), but picking up b-ball kept me going. I enjoyed the competition, even if I was outmatched. And I was always motivated to get better.

Just my 0.02. Hope it helps.
 

tenuous~hold

Well-known member
TucanSam, I feel the same way except I'm worse off than you. I do not have a job. I have no desire to get a job. I've had every day off for the last 3 years and spent them in my apartment playing videogames or doing other unproductive useless bull****. I'm just waiting for the day I die. I've had my fill of trying to understand life's purpose. I'm just going to sit back and watch other people work their hands to the bone for stuff they don't need.

Nothing matters.

i feel the same way most days, or at least half the days. it's worse when i'm thinking about how empty & useless everything is.

we need distractions, to take us away from the nothingness. it just seems like too much effort to try to find some at times.
 
Hey Tucansam ,

i say , if you don't find a reason to live anymore , just live to help others , this is the best you can do , and you will see how much good it will do to others , and to you also

I think this is good advice...although it might take a while for you to finish the grieving process. Take your time. Don't expect to be cheerful and light-hearted straight away.
 
In answer to your question which is really the most important question for all of us...what is the meaning of my life...I will say this.

Sometimes or often the meaning of our life is not clear..you just have to put one foot in front of the other..soldier on...keep going ...don't lose hope...I truly believe the meaning of my life will be revealed to me one day. There will be a kind of judgement day when we will be assessed on our loving attitude versus our hateful attitude...the hateful parts may need redoing so God will send us back until we get it right. Our attitude to our suffering will be assessed too. If we complain a lot, resent and be unforgiving then those parts too will need redoing. We are all works in progress. What we don't learn in this life will carry on to the next life.

I'm not trivialising your pain and suffering. Sounds like you had a really hard time losing your partner. I can't imagine how I would feel losing my partner. Devastated is the word that comes closest. And so alone. I guess you could meet some kind of support group for people that lost a family member or friend like yourself. My advie would be to seek some spiritual guidance eg. Christian..buddhist...you don't have to agree with all their dogmas...just use the prayer/meditation practices to heal your heart and mind. Plus you could meet some really sensitive people there.
 

Luke1993

Well-known member
TucanSam, I feel the same way except I'm worse off than you. I do not have a job. I have no desire to get a job. I've had every day off for the last 3 years and spent them in my apartment playing videogames or doing other unproductive useless bull****. I'm just waiting for the day I die. I've had my fill of trying to understand life's purpose. I'm just going to sit back and watch other people work their hands to the bone for stuff they don't need.

Nothing matters.

Out of interest how do you survive with no income?
 
I have very few friends, and none I would call close (in proximity or in relation). I have a job, and school, but have no drive to really do anything anymore. I recently lost the great love of my life, and have a hard time imagining ever loving again. It's been about a year and a half since I broke up with her, and I still have not found myself over her. I used to enjoy writing, drawing, singing, but just dont have a passion for those anymore. I am on antidepressants, but they don't seem to be making things better. I think about suicide everyday. Not in a, I want to kill myself way, but in a Why should I keep living sort of way. I just don't really see much of a point to life anymore. There isnt really anything I havent done that I want to, or think I'll have the chance to do. does anyone else struggle with this?

For the few friends, close or not, for the job, for school, for the potential of loving another, for the hobbies you can enjoy again, for YOU. For the potential YOU have. For the life you could have and all the things you've ever wanted to do and all the places you've ever wanted to go. And everything that you aspire toward. That's the reason. We spend enough time in the ground, way more in there than we do above it. When I go into the ground I want to know that I did everything that I could do that I wanted and have absolutely minimal regrets. There is always something to live for. When you go, there is no coming back, it's final and over and that is it, done. I hate finality. There will always be something to live for, always.
 
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peanutsmum

Member
Nowadays since God has become controversial instead of a given, people have no real hope. So when life becomes too hard to cope, they so much more often, these days, resort to suicide when finding out antidepressants are only a short time relief at best.

That's dangerous ground we have come to in our society because we all experience times of extreme hardship whether it be a lost love, no friends, no money, or illness...It's inevitable and no-one is the exception.

Obviously, I advice reading the Bible and asking God in earnest, for help... Good luck to you.
 
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peanutsmum

Member
^this is so offensive on so many levels

On the same token, I'm offended that you took what I said out of context. -If you were to read the entire post, it's only offensive to someone that feels no-one has a right to believe and to voice that belief, if it differs from their own.

Only when we have tolerance and respect for others views, do we have freedoms.
 
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