Do people ever talk over you?
- Thread starter Nervous
- Start date
People sense you're not confident when it comes to talking, and as humans naturally like to talk about themselves, they'll overtalk you, most likely about how things are doing for them, or something that interests them. I think it has to do with lack of being assertive in a conversation. One key problem I personally have is whenever 2 people begin to talk at once, I always apologise and tell them to continue. They sense this and usually the next time they just continue talking and expect me to shut up, in which case I do.
At least in my experience LOL.
powerfulthoughts
Well-known member
Yep, people can sense when you are weak and have low confidence, so they will take advantage of you by doing things like talking over you, butting in, etc. to show their own strength. I'm sure it's unconscious on their part, but it's all about the power struggle and egos trying to be the biggest.
gsmax5
Well-known member
I'm not sure if they really "sense" you're confident (I could be wrong), but I think that some people just have 'weaker' voices. Loudmouthed jerks always used to talk over me in elementary/middle school, now they listen though since I NEVER EVER open my mouth so I have the reputation of the "Mysterious quiet kid who will probably end up being a serial killer".
*Sorry for the run-on*
I'm probably the last person to become a serial killer though. I have always been a really gentle 'wimp', and I'm *kind of* proud of it. The feeling of "guilt" really has a more negative effect on me than most people as well.
lyricalliaisons
Well-known member
Yes, all the time. It makes me mad because I very rarely do talk & when I do it's as if people interrupt what I say with their own words, just ignore me, change the subject.
Riptor
1
I get talked over often, but what frustrates me more is when I speak up and people simply don't hear me.
A consistent example is greeting people at work. If someone asks me how I'm doing and I say <great, so-so, shitty, whatever> and then immediately ask them how they're doing, they've already gone on their way and don't hear me at all. It's like they don't expect me to do more than a minimum of talking and are closed to the possibility of me saying anything more. This sucks when I'm actually feeling talkative, it's like getting shut down before I've had a chance to do anything.
A consistent example is greeting people at work. If someone asks me how I'm doing and I say <great, so-so, shitty, whatever> and then immediately ask them how they're doing, they've already gone on their way and don't hear me at all. It's like they don't expect me to do more than a minimum of talking and are closed to the possibility of me saying anything more. This sucks when I'm actually feeling talkative, it's like getting shut down before I've had a chance to do anything.
gsmax5
Well-known member
That ALWAYS happens to me. I've cried over things like this.
Don't talk
No not really. Well, I never talk in the first place so maybe that's why, I mean if I'm not even giving them a chance to. The oppotunity for someone to talk over me is extremely rare. Well, but seriously I don't talk super quiet. Plus I know if someone did start talking over me I would just start talking louder so that it would tune them out more, because that is seriously annoying.
No not really. Well, I never talk in the first place so maybe that's why, I mean if I'm not even giving them a chance to. The oppotunity for someone to talk over me is extremely rare. Well, but seriously I don't talk super quiet. Plus I know if someone did start talking over me I would just start talking louder so that it would tune them out more, because that is seriously annoying.
Re: Don't talk
Heh some of us are too much of a coward to interrupt those "important" people talking. Sucks but it's a reality for some of us. Awesome that you can conjure up the strength to put people in their place, though! Good job.
Heh some of us are too much of a coward to interrupt those "important" people talking. Sucks but it's a reality for some of us. Awesome that you can conjure up the strength to put people in their place, though! Good job.