mismeek
Well-known member
I've been doing awesome these past few years. Yeah I have a couple of panic attacks here or there, but I understand that they will probably never really go away and I'm okay with that. I'm in my last few months of graduate school and I'm currently living in Alaska for my educational clinical. I give speech therapy services to elementary students in a couple of school. I'm not super fond of children, but they effing love me, so I guess it works out lol.
Anyway.. I'm getting pretty stressed out: My grandpa- who I live with back home- had a stroke and can no longer care for himself, My adviser for my Thesis has quit and moved back home to AUS and is no responding to my emails. I'm taking two online classes on top of giving direct services to 50+ students during the week so I'm constantly planning for sessions or doing homework. I also have a boyfriend who is stationed in Japan demands my time also
I received an email today saying that my medical clinical wants to push my start date back so that i will be working there from 4/2-5/28 instead of 3/17-5/11. I'm suppose to GRADUATE 5/17. Im suppose to leave for Japan to visit 5/24.
I guess its just a few weeks difference but with my anxiety I feel like my world is imploding. I don't really like change and with all this other stress I can feel my agoraphobic self coming back. I'm starting to avoid leaving the house and when I do. I'm nauseous and twitchy and most recently I've begun to cry. I'm worried the kids will notice ( you know how they can smell fear) and eat me alive. I'm also worried of having a full blown panic attack, those things are slippery slopes if you have one somewhere then you have them EVERYWHERE. I can't afford to mess up this clinical, but being so far from home I feel that its inevitable.
I don't know why I'm sharing this, I know you guys can't help me.
but if any of you can manage to get out here and gently smother me in my sleep, I would greatly appreciate it.
meek
Anyway.. I'm getting pretty stressed out: My grandpa- who I live with back home- had a stroke and can no longer care for himself, My adviser for my Thesis has quit and moved back home to AUS and is no responding to my emails. I'm taking two online classes on top of giving direct services to 50+ students during the week so I'm constantly planning for sessions or doing homework. I also have a boyfriend who is stationed in Japan demands my time also
I received an email today saying that my medical clinical wants to push my start date back so that i will be working there from 4/2-5/28 instead of 3/17-5/11. I'm suppose to GRADUATE 5/17. Im suppose to leave for Japan to visit 5/24.
I guess its just a few weeks difference but with my anxiety I feel like my world is imploding. I don't really like change and with all this other stress I can feel my agoraphobic self coming back. I'm starting to avoid leaving the house and when I do. I'm nauseous and twitchy and most recently I've begun to cry. I'm worried the kids will notice ( you know how they can smell fear) and eat me alive. I'm also worried of having a full blown panic attack, those things are slippery slopes if you have one somewhere then you have them EVERYWHERE. I can't afford to mess up this clinical, but being so far from home I feel that its inevitable.
I don't know why I'm sharing this, I know you guys can't help me.
but if any of you can manage to get out here and gently smother me in my sleep, I would greatly appreciate it.
meek